(Closed) UPDATE: Waiting is torture

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

No worries, I’d be obsessing, too!  And to my obsession-prone brain, that does sound suspicious.  Especially if he’s normally very secretive about his plans and wouldn’t just casually mention that he’d planned to talk to your dad.  

But then again I’ve spent months convincing myself that all the “not yet” signals are just elaborate plans to throw me off the scent, so my judgment is probably unreliable.  My Boyfriend or Best Friend is so good at playing things really close to the chest that he doesn’t need to tell me fibs to throw me off – all he has to do is simply say nothing.  Rrrgh.

Post # 4
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee

@Lalai:

Interesting… I didn’t think it was cool or not to ask your b/f if he has asked permission yet. Is it really ok if you ask him if he’s spoken to your parents?

I remember about two years ago my b/f said to me: “When we were at your parents house for dinner tonight I was going to ask your dad to go golfing sometime in the near future and ask him permission to marry you. But then your brother and g/f interrupted me and announced their engagement.” Not kidding. Literally… My b/f was walking over to my father to ask him when my now sister in law stepped in front of us and showed her ring. After that comment he made, he has not spoken about asking my dad for permission (other than telling me recently that when he proposes I’d be third in line to know because he’d talk to my dad, then call his parents, and then ask me).

Very interesting indeed… Do you think it is a bad question to ask your b/f… If he’s asked permission? I honestly have no clue. If it’s ok… What the heck am I waiting for!?!? LOL

Gwen.

Post # 5
Member
2714 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Gwen von D: That’s a really good question… I probly would have asked, but that’s because I’m really nosy and not because I think it’s okay..Haha I do a lot of things that are probly “not okay”.

Anyways, my SO actually volunteered that information and told me that he had talked to my parents. I don’t know why (but it might have something to do with the fact that he knew I would ask him about it anyways) but either way, I’m deff glad he told me!

Post # 7
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@Gwen von D:  I guess I wouldn’t feel bad about asking, if it was something I knew was important to my parents and I wanted to make sure Boyfriend or Best Friend didn’t miss it.  In my case though, it’s actually the opposite – Boyfriend or Best Friend has let me know that he thinks it’s important for him to talk to my parents, but when I mentioned it to Mom and Dad they said “Awwww, that’s nice!  But do people really do that anymore?”

Of course, I did ask him once if he’d talked to my dad – just being nosy to see if we were making any progress towards the proposal.  I guess it depends on what the overall communication level is.  We’re being very secretive about it all, so I considered it pretty bold of me to ask!

Post # 8
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@Chipmunk:  You might be onto something here!  I may start inducing Boyfriend or Best Friend to drink more – in vino veritas, right? 😉

Post # 9
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee

@Lalai:

Hehehe, this is hilarious… Talking about getting our b/f’s drunk to get them to talk. It’s like an interrogation technique, LMAO!! HOWEVER, it works!! On our 3 year anniversary we both had a lot to drink (not drunk, but we drank enough to get really chatty). Anyhoo, he went on and on about our wedding, and how he has family from out of town that we’ll have to accomodate, and how we’ll have to mix up the tables at our reception because I have way more family than he does, etc. etc. It was a great conversation, but I honestly didn’t want to talk about weddings on our anniversary. It was bad enough that there was TWO wedding parties getting their photo’s taken right in front of us as we ate. Lovely.

Gwen.

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