(Closed) Upset at my mother & I don't see it getting better

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
319 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Hey lady!  I’m sorry.  🙁  My mom and sister are kind of the same way.  When we got engaged I called my mom 20 minutes after it happened and she said “Well that’s nice.  Did you pick a date?”.  My charming sister said (in a very monotone voice) “That’s good.  I know you’ve wanted this for a long time”. 

Awesome.

My suggestion is just let it go.  I know it’s hard and your feelings are hurt.  I don’t blame you one bit.  But your mom is who she is and you can’t change her.  Who knows the reason why she’s acting the way she is.  Maybe she’s stressed at work. Or dealing with some stuff. Or maybe she doesn’t get emotional about things (for the record – that was an exact quote by my mom).  

Instead of worrying about her – focus on the fact that you are getting married! Spend time with people who are excited for you (your friends, FI’s family, people at work).  I don’t care if you and your Fiance have been together for 20 years…you still have every right to be excited as the next bride.

And finally….CONGRATS!!  🙂

 

Post # 5
Member
901 posts
Busy bee

I have a few family members who are a little dysfunctional, but I choose to have them in my life and overlook a lot of their weird behavior. Everytime I consciously choose to overlook something they do that I don’t like, I tell myself I’m choosing to have them in my life and diffuse the drama. I’m in control.

That aproach might not work for everyone, but it’s been empowering for me.

Post # 6
Member
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I’m sorry to hear your mom isn’t being supportive during what is supposed to be one of the most exciting times in your life.

I would go ahead and plan your wedding for when YOU want it. You will get married once. She can travel any other time.

Post # 7
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

My mom acted the same, and I was upset about it. However, it was because she saw things I didn’t.

 

If you are happy about it, you need to tell her. Tell her exactly how you feel? Sorry she wasn’t as excited as you would have liked.

Post # 9
Member
1963 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Aww I am glad to see this update! Now that you know she does care and just doesn’t know what to do, maybe it will get better as long as you can tell her what you want from her 🙂

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