(Closed) Upset my sister is trying to schedule her wedding 3 weeks before mine?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
24 posts
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Caswell Beach- Oak Island, NC

stephanie.raley:  Sounds like she is being a bratty little teenager. They aren’t even engaged. I wouldn’t stress over the situation until it actually happens.

On top of that, I would reality check her and remind her they aren’t engaged and she shouldn’t put her ducks in a row until he actually proposes.

Post # 3
1465 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

stephanie.raley:  Of course you should be upset. That sucks! 

But tell me more… will her SO only be around for a little bit limiting the dates that they could get married? I know that that can be an issue for military weddings, it’s very hard to find dates that work. She might not really have a choice. 

It is pretty weird that she is bringing this up just after you get engaged. I wonder if she’s jealous at all about the attention you are getting (or appear to be getting in her eyes). I am really throwing ideas around here, I have no idea what is going on, but it does sound kind of strange to me. If I were you I might ask her why that date. I also think it’s kind of presumptuous to “set” a wedding date when one is not even engaged. Maybe she’s just trying to make sure you don’t take that date? 

Post # 4
434 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I would talk to your parents and see if they can reason with her…

Post # 5
402 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Royal Park Hotel


stephanie.raley:  90% sure she’s not going to get engaged when she says she is.  98% sure she’s not going to book her wedding on the date she says. 

If I had to guess I would think she’s just trying to ruffle your feathers and get the attention in the family

Post # 7
434 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Well, sounds like you can’t do much about it. You get one day, she gets one day. I would just focus on your own wedding, try to be happy for her and let her make her own decisions.

Post # 8
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I would be really upset.. No advice really you cant tell someone YOU CANT GET MARRIED then but if everyone has to travel for both discuss it with parents etc.. But its not 100% sure thing so you just keep having fun with planning!!

Post # 9
6226 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

Just send out your save the dates ASAP, sit back, and let things unfold as they will! It’ll be fine.

Post # 10
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Ugh I would be so annoyed. Make sure you have your save the dates out if you don’t already, thays for sure! Does she have a dream venue? Chances are she will have a hard time booking what she wants so close to the actual date so everything she is planning in her head might not even be possible yet. I would try not to let it bother you -just keep your plans more secretive so she can’t copy any ideas- and hope it dsnt actually happen.

Post # 11
402 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Royal Park Hotel


MeiFrancis:  I was going to say the same thing too.  I had two cousins where one had a Friday wedding in Michigan and one had a Saturday wedding in Philly.    90% of the entire family went to the Philly wedding and skipped out on the other one because the Philly bride sent her Save the Dates out way before the other.   Early bird gets the worm.

Honestly – from what you’ve told me…..I would pick your wedding over hers if I HAD to pick.  And I suspect that’s what most will do.  First come, first served

Post # 12
3339 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

She’s not even engaged yet.  Don’t get upset prematurely.

And you get ONE DAY.  Not a month, not a year.  She can choose to get married whenever she wants.  If she doesn’t give her guests enough notice, chances are they’ll come to your wedding and not hers anyway because yours is what they will have planned for.

Post # 13
7646 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

stephanie.raley:  I wouldn’t worry about this right now.

As a sister of a Marine, when my brother went through basic, he received his orders shortly before graduating. I don’t know how your sister’s boyfriend has gotten to thinking that they are going to be moving to San Diego, but they don’t just let you pick where you want to go. Not only that, and maybe it will be different for your sister’s boyfriend, but my brother didn’t have any say in where he was going nor did he have an opportunity to take any time off. We are very fortunate that he was even able to take off a little time to make it to my wedding 2 years ago when he was in training/school because he pretty much had to beg and plead. Plus that meant he couldn’t come home for Christmas.

Anyway, all that aside, I wouldn’t worry about this until after he’s gone through basic and proposes. A LOT can change from the time someone enters into basic training to graduation. I think she is thinking WAY too far ahead of herself.

Post # 14
9021 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

just make sure you get your Save-The-Date Cards and invitations out before hers

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