(Closed) Using Bridesmaid Dress as part of a costume disrespectful?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Does a Bride get a say in what her bridesmaids do with their dresses after the wedding?
    Yes, it was her wedding she gets a say. : (1 votes)
    0 %
    Yes, but only if she paid for the dresses. : (22 votes)
    8 %
    No, the bride only has control of those dresses and BMs during the wedding day : (257 votes)
    92 %
  • Post # 32
    Member
    2959 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Nope! Every Bridesmaid or Best Man dress I ever owned was immediately passed on to my daughter or a niece to play dress-up in. Many many “princesses” wore my Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses. As good of an use as any!

    As for your bride friend thinking it was “disrespectful” – well that is just plain crazy talk! She will get over it!

    Post # 33
    Member
    9951 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    TO @JaneyDcat:  ooooo, I want a piece of this.  1987 Maid/Matron of Honor dress.  Electric Blue / Sapphire Blue Satin with 3/4 Mutton Sleeves.  Midi length.  Worn with dyed to match satin shoes… and white lace short gloves.

    PHOTO – Not MY Dress… but very similar (BUT a far brighter intense shade of blue)

    To be honest, it was all the fashion then… and very high end for a Wedding.  But I’d die a 1000 deaths now !!

     

    Post # 34
    Member
    955 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @This Time Round:  I don’t have a picture of the worst bridesmaid dress I wore– I think it was 1994 or 1995.

     

    Red satin with a lace overlay.  One large buttbow, puffy sleeves with bows attached to both sleeves.  Red shoes to match.  It was raining that September day….I don’t think the red dye came off my feet until Christmas.

     

    This is a close match for what I had to wear to that wedding…luckily, no pictures of me wearing that dress are still in existence (nobody had a digital camera back then, so I think I’m safe from the embarrassment from somebody uploading that crap to facebook.)

     

    http://www.uglydress.com/pooflacgreen.html

     

    Post # 35
    Member
    1010 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @ExcitedHooper:  I think the bride may have been embarrassed when the dress was recognized, and possibly thought you wore it as a costume as a way of making fun of its ‘ugliness’ (real or perceived). That’s probably why she freaked out. If you bought the dress and she is offended by your choice in wearing it, offer to sell it back to her. If she declines, then kindly tell her to put on her big-girl panties and deal with it. Your dress, your choice.

    I have at least 2 dresses and a wedding gown in my closet I will never wear again. didn’t occur to me to re-wear as costumes, but hey, I might just do that! Might even donate the wedding dress to be repurposed into christening gowns for babies or something. 🙂

     

    Post # 36
    Member
    1669 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014 - Church

    I can understand why she would be hurt, however, it was after the wedding. If it were before her wedding then that would be a different story.

    Post # 37
    Member
    3092 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I actually did this!  I did alter part of the dress…and the bride saw pics I posted and she loved it.  It was a shiny red dress, we made a scarf and bow tie for Fiance to go with our sexy french couple outfit for Teatro Zinzanni 🙂

    Post # 38
    Member
    2268 posts
    Buzzing bee

    @Jabberwocky:  “Wow. That’s a new level of over controlling. No, she doesn’t get any say in what  you do with a dress you paid for after her wedding.

    On another note, have you considered turning the dress into a skirt?

    Post # 39
    Member
    2285 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: Central Park

    @ExcitedHooper:  Since it is a mixture it will turn out splotchy. Cotton uses soda based dye, and polyester uses acid based dyes. So you can’t dye it at home. I don’t know what the manufacturers use, probably a blend of the two dyes. What does the dress look like? Maybe you could alter it to be wearable.

    Post # 40
    Member
    9951 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    TO @JaneyDcat:  lol, that dress is definitely IN THE RUNNING !!

    ROTFLMAO at the shoe comment.  Dyed shoes / Coloured shoes were quite fashionable in the 1980s… I remember that I decided that of the whole outfit they were the bomb… so I’d wear them on another occasion (but it was raining).  And like yourself it was a total frickin disaster.

    Feet turned a gorgeous shade of “Sunoco” Blue… and the shoes got rain drop spots all over them.

    Two major league strike outs… in one day !!

    Lol, like you no pictures anywhere of me on-line in this fiasco (first time or second)… thank goodness.  Just one more reason WHY FaceBook has ruined the world !!

     

    Post # 41
    Member
    1202 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @ExcitedHooper:  That’s great you found a second use for a Bridesmaid or Best Man dress! One of my Bridesmaid or Best Man plans to use the Bridesmaid or Best Man dress from my wedding as a Halloween costume this year. LOL I think it’s great otherwise the dress is going to just hang in your closet collecting dust! A lot of Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses aren’t really appropriate to wear again after the wedding because they look like Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses. I don’t care what my girls do with the dresses after my wedding, that is completely up to them. And the bride whose wedding you were in was bothered by you using the dress as a costume? Seriously?!?!! LOL wow…her wedding is over with and it isn’t as though you completely destroyed the dress and even if you did…who cares! And I really don’t think she has say if you paid for the dress! LOL wow…maybe the girl still wants to relive her wedding? 

    Post # 42
    Member
    648 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    It’s your call to do what you want with the dress. The wedding day was the bride’s day, but it stops after that. It’s your dress and you paid for it. She has zero say over what you do with it after her wedding day. Yeesh, so many bridezillas these days. Sorry she made you feel bad, but you didn’t do anything wrong so don’t worry:)

    Post # 43
    Member
    4429 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    @ExcitedHooper:  i threw mine away after the wedding lol it was soooo ugly i could not sell it at my yard sale it was burnt orange ;( fall wedding

    Post # 44
    Member
    4435 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    She’s crazy and sounds controlling! You wore it for her wedding day and after that you do what you like. I wore a lengha for my friend’s east indian wedding- she told all the bridesmaids that she knew we’d never wear them again and to feel free to wear them for Hallowe’en, give them away or whatever! And she even paid for all of them. I sold mine on ebay:) Your friend needs to loosen up, imho.

    Post # 45
    Member
    853 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    @Sweet_Tea:  These are really good ideas.  And honestly I never thought about using old Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses for costumes before, but it’s the best idea I’ve heard.

    Every wedding I’ve been in they’ve had this “oh you’ll wear it again, right?” and we all lie and say how pretty it is, and how we absolutely will.  My Maid/Matron of Honor said she might wear the dress to work with a cardigan and my immediate reaction was “sweetie, don’t lie to me, you can tear it up for dusting scraps if you want as long as you wait until the day after.”

    Post # 46
    Member
    3420 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

    Hell no! You have the right to do whatever you want with the dress you paid for (and hate btw). You didn’t alter it. you just jazzed it up. That former bride needs to remove that stick from her butt

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