Post # 1
I put my deposit down on my venue: a wonderful Japanese garden. I talked to the owner about adding an extra hour and serving appitizers after the ceremony. He said it was OK and I thought we were good.
i received the contract via mail today and it says nothing about my extra hour. It also says on big bold letters: No food allowed.
I left a voicemail asking them about it and if it was ok, if I could have it in the contract.
Fiance says that’s being pushy and we should just find a reception site. Am I being pushy? I’m so stressed!
Post # 3
- Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World
@MissFireFlower: I don’t think it’s pushy…if they agreed, it should all be written out in the contract.
Post # 4
Nope. Totally agree. I would want it in the contract. If not, are you going to try to find somewhere else, or lose the extra hour and appetizers?
Post # 5
They probably just forgot. Just ask them for a new contract.
Post # 6
Dudette, this venue is going to be a nightmare for you. I can feel it in my bones. Every thing you’ve posted has made me worried that this venue isn’t going to meet your needs with all the restrictions on food, what can be put on grass, how it has to be served (or not served) etc.
You certainly can call them, but my gut is telling me that this place will be beautiful but a nightmare.
If your Fiance is pushing for somewhere else, plus everything else, I’d be really leaning towards going somewhere that is going to be more reception friendly.
Post # 7
@MissFireFlower: i have a similar issue. my venue has repeatedly told me that providing i use their entertainment services for the ceremony and the dinner, i can bring in my own band. then in the contract it stated “no outside musicians allowed”. venue lady says its fine – but im not signing it unless its amended or things could go very wrong
you were definitely right to try to talk to them – if you dont ask, you dont know
Post # 8
@Quietserenity: we’d just drop the extra hour and find a reception site. That’s something I need to know ASAP though, as we have a 50 person guest list and we’re too small for a hall, but Fiance doesn’t want a restraunt reception. So I’d have to get creative and start looking now
Post # 9
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Get it in writing or find another venue. It sounds like you don’t have a signed contract anyway at this point. Refuse the contract unless it contains the terms you discussed. May need to print it out and have the owner add the additional terms and sign off on them.
Post # 10
@NAve I have that feeling too…it’s just shitty. My dream of an elegant affair in the garden is slipping away…
Post # 11
Not pushy, I would definitely want that in writing
Post # 12
@MissFireFlower: 🙁 I feel for you!! I have to say, trust your gut though. Better to be disappointed now than pulling your hair out and disappointed later. It sucks – boo!
Are there any arboretums or anything in the area? Greenhouses?
Post # 13
Good contracts = Happy Customers.
Get as much as you can in writing, if they refuse, go somewhere else.
Post # 14
Oh, and I know this won’t make you feel better now, but maybe it will help? It has helped me with things, because I am OBSESSED with the look & feel of my venue/decor (taking a crappy venue and dressing it up).
What you will remember is not how things LOOK, but how they feel. If you’re stressed about where you can put tables and what food you can serve, even in the most beautiful garden, you won’t have great memories. If you’re in a slightly less beautiful, but very accommodating and helpful, setting – you’ll have awesome memories.
That’s what I keep telling myself! The look of the place absolutely does impact how you feel about the day, but a stressful vendor situation can wipe all that beauty out in a heartbeat.
Post # 15
However, if you really have your heart set on this site for the ceremony, count on that and do yourself a favor and find a separate reception site.
Post # 16
You’re not being pushy at all. Get it in writing otherwise he has no obligation to actually let you do it.