Post # 1
Good Morning Bees! Quick Question!
I have an amazing cousin who I am not super close with, but when we talk its like there was no time gap….LOVE LOVE LOVE her! Not super close, but the closest of my cousins, if that makes any sense…
She is a professional photographer, in New York/New Jersey, and an AMAZING one at that!
I prefer her to NOT be my photographer because I want to enjoy her since I only see her once every couple of years…& I want her to have fun! Is it ok not to ask her to do my wedding or engagement photos??? Will it insult her if I don’t ask her??? Will it insult her if I do ask her? Will she think I don’t like her work? She prolly doesn’t want the pressure of coming to Florida to shoot my wedding on her shoulders…HELP!!!
Post # 3
I think it’s perfectly fine not to ask her, and if she asks just say you want her to be able to relax and enjoy the day with you 🙂 I will be asking my aunt and uncle to do our wedding photos, my aunt did our engagement photos and did a great job. They are both doctors not professional photographers, but they travel a lot and take lots of photos and are very camera savvy!
Post # 4
@ForeverAndEverAfter: YES. I think it is great to not ask her to shoot your wedding. That is her job. She is invited as a guest.
I was discussing this with my photographer yesterday, and she’s made the choice not to shoot any friends’ weddings. It’s just too hard to enjoy yourself while also working the party.
I would talk to your cousin, and tell her she’s got the night off, and you’d love to have her opinion on some local photogrphers!
Post # 5
Don’t ask. There are so many threads about these situations going horribly wrong. Just hire a professional, invite your cousin, and let her enjoy the wedding. If she’s fantastic, I’m sure she’ll bring her own camera anyway and will share some of her shots with you after the wedding!
Post # 6
Has she offered to take the photos already? If she hasnt offered, then I wouldnt bring it up.
Post # 7
You could always ask her to do engagment photos (and be willing pay her rate as well- she may give you a deal or make it a gift) but then hire someone to do your wedding photos. that way she is a part of the day and you have some awesome pictures!
Post # 8
@ForeverAndEverAfter: it wont insult her if you dont ask her but if youre worried say something like “i want you to enjoy my wedding as a guest, but could you give me a tip hwo to find a photographer with a similar style. i love your work”
honestly, the pro photographers (and other wedding related vendors) prefer NOT to be asked to do friends and family weddings simply because
– theyre working and not a real guest. so they dont enjoy wedding
– theyre often expected to do it for free as a wedding gift or with a massive discount. so theyre neither enjoying themselves nor making money
and also its easier to have a professional relationship with vendors as family relationships can conflict with expectations etc