(Closed) VENT! Best Man dropped out 26 days before the wedding!

posted 6 years ago in Grooms/men
  • poll: Did you lose a member of your wedding party less than a month before the big day?
    Yes : (8 votes)
    28 %
    No : (21 votes)
    72 %
  • Post # 3
    9550 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Ugh – I’m so sorry that you’re having to deal with this!! That totally sucks. Espeically since you’ve already printed the programs!! But if this guy is such trouble, maybe it’s a blessing in disguise. I’d don’t have any good advise except maybe spend a good couple minutes bitching him out and venting and then move on. It’ll work out. Is there another groomsman that could step up? You’ve still got time to get together a bach party! And it’s easy to switch out who’s standing next to your groomie. And don’t worry about having uneven sides – not a problem at all. I’m sure it will work out but I totally understand that this is really frustrating! Hugs!

    Post # 4
    7609 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    What a tool.  Your Fiance has learned his lesson about this guy I hope (try to keep the I Told You Sos to yourself if you can – he knows)!  You should definitely soak all the ruined programs in cat pee and send them to him pronto.

    Post # 6
    1659 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Is everything okay with him? You obviously don’t like this guy but honestly I think my first question would be what kind of trouble he’s in that he needs to borrow money, rather than reprinting programs. At any rate, it’s a sucky situation but please remember that he isn’t doing this to spite or antagonize you or your Fiance – it just sounds like he’s just not very smart.

    Post # 7
    1902 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    @Ellegee:  I agree competely… Yeah, this is a pain in the arse for you, but I think it’s a little hard on him to say “Because of this, we have to reprint the programs!” when he’s asking your partner for help. Yes, he was tactless and should have explained the situation beforehand, rather than eaping straight into asking for money (which I think is just rude), but he hasn’t done this deliberately to disrupt your wedding. It’s frustrating, but it’s not like he’s ruined your day – by the sounds of it, you don’t really like him, so isn’t this a good thing for you? You don’t have to worry about his behaviour on the day!

    Post # 9
    8441 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    @epalmisano829:  Well maybe he waited because it is a pretty damn embarrassing thing to have to tell people. All I am saying is a little bit of compassion for someone in a hard spot might be nice!

    Post # 10
    2981 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    YES! Our Best Man didn’t even SHOW UP to our wedding! He lied to my Darling Husband the whole time about coming, flaked on planning the bachelor party, and just did not show up the day of the wedding. His mom was in tears. Everyone on that side or that knew him was really upset. Obvoiusly, his name was still in the programs. The family thinks it’s prescription drug related. It’s so sad and pathetic. They were best friends for years.

    My Maid/Matron of Honor also flaked on me 21 days before the wedding. She and my matron of honor got into a major fight about how the Maid/Matron of Honor was treating everyone the night of my bachelorette party, and it went on for weeks. I tried not to get sucked in to it, but the Maid/Matron of Honor acted poorly, and deep down, I knew it.

    Stuff like this happens, and it sucks, but I don’t think your former Best Man was doing it deliberitely. He just sounds like a total flake. I’d be pissed off too tho. I think you have every right to vent and be upset at the situation.

    Post # 12
    1934 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Unfortunately, yea, it sucks.  But it happens.  We had a groomsman drop out about 2 weeks ago (3 weeks before our wedding).  We, however, had an idea that it was coming.  People get really weird around weddings.

    Post # 13
    2493 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    We just had a Groomsmen drop out, last night. The sad thing is, he really wanted to be a part of our big day (his reaction when Fiance asked him to be a Groomsmen was priceless!), so he feels really bad about it. He just couldn’t get the time off from work, though.

    Post # 14
    470 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Undecided whaaaa 

    thats messed up

    Post # 15
    713 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012 - Watch tower lodge, Black hawk state Park Rock Island, IL

    yeah we just had a groomsman bail, which was originally supposed to be the best man but we didnt hear from him for months…so we downgraded him…well its been over 6 months and still havnt heard from him via, email, fb, or phone..so were just assuming hes not going to be there…im not very happy about it. oh and two of our ushers just bailed too…im NOT reprinting my programs……i did them myself and there is no way in hell im redoing all that work!

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