(Closed) VENT! FMIL feels it's her place to judge re: marriage…

posted 4 years ago in Family
Post # 3
3748 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

That is horrible!! Poor little girl! At least no one else takes her seriously. Sounds like you have a lot of support from the rest of the family. I work in a nursing home and always think about what  will happen to these people/ who will take care of them in old age if they treat their families so horribly now!

Post # 5
397 posts
Helper bee

That is so insane.   Does she not realize that SHE herself isn’t family either?  She is a STEP… therefore not blood related!!

Unless I read that wrong!

Post # 7
1511 posts
Bumble bee

That is terrible! But not so unheard of… my Grandma refused to accept my cousin as her granddaughter when my uncle got together with my now aunt…. she was a little baby when they met and it has taken 8 years to where she includes her name when she talks about her grandkids…

Post # 8
397 posts
Helper bee

That makes me so sad for all the grandkids.   I’m 40 years old and can’t have kids of my own, and if it weren’t for  my nieces and nephews I would probably be a raging alcoholic.  LOL

I have a 15 year old “blood” niece (Who I got guardianship of in the last year) and a 6 year old “blood” nephew in addition to 2 step-nephews and a step-niece.  And then I am an honorary aunt to another newphew (My best friends son).  And 2 soon to be step sons!! I don’t treat them any different then I do the “blood” ones. 

My “step-sons” were 1 1/2 and 3 when I started dating their dad, and I treat them like I would if they were my own.

How sad for your F (STEP)MIL to be so petty over something so small.  The kids will feel or sense her attitude, and figure out what kind of person she is on their own someday.

Post # 10
397 posts
Helper bee

@BlueBelle0927:  Step families can be better then real ones.  My DAD married my mom when I was 5 and even though he is a step parent he has been the only constant in my entire life, INCLUDING my own mother!

My niece I have guardianship of, is my sisters daughter and let me tell you, I completely prefer my sister by LOVE and CHOICE over my sister by BLOOD!  

Looks like someone has to give your FMIL the Step (NON-blood) family handbook on loving others!  Laughing

Post # 11
4664 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@BlueBelle0927:  How awful! I wouldn’t be “looking forward” to it either, and I would totally not be comfortable letting someone like that spend time alone with my children to teach them how to senselessly draw lines in the sand to divide people from each other.

Post # 12
1369 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@BlueBelle0927:  WTF??? Doesn’t make sense at all. Crazy woman.

Post # 14
11242 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Ugh wtf. People like this make my head numb.

FI and I both have nontraditional families (half siblings, stepparents, stepgrandparents, stepcousins, married in cousins), and everyone is family.

Post # 15
838 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2008

Quite honestly, I come from a family that says that if her stepson hasn’t thought enough to make her family and has decided that she’s only fit to play house with, then there’s no reason to treat her like family, because she isn’t.

I see no problem. I was Miss DJones to every child in the family UP UNTIL the day before our wedding, at which point my MIL started correcting all the kids and telling them that I was Aunt DJones. We do the same thing on my side of the family. Just because the world has all of a sudden decided to accept everyone with this lax version of standards, doesn’t mean that everyone has to because folks don’t want their feelings hurt.

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