(Closed) Vent-Odd convo with the boy..

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

ugghhh – im not a patient gal so i wouldnt have lasted 2yrs from when we picked out rings to still be sitting there waiting

if he said “we can set a date and you’ll get a ring before October” to me, i would have answered with “or how about you pack your stuff now and leave your key on the coffee table on your way out”

but then again – im a get what i want now kinda gal ๐Ÿ™‚

goodluck because i couldnt be a nice as you are about it.. hopefully hes just messing with you

 

Post # 4
Member
531 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Does the venue require a non-refundable deposit?  I think you should book it and see what happens.

Post # 6
Member
1154 posts
Bumble bee

I would read that conversation as you being engaged and so free to plan and book a venue but that he’ll get you the ring in February. 

However given the 2 years!!! I’ve no idea.  Why two years?  Was he or you not ready to get engaged when you went to look at rings? 

Post # 7
Member
4024 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

we had our venue before i had a ring! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 8
Member
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

We booked the venue and photographer before he “officially proposed” so I would talk to him seriously and make him know that even though you don’t have a ring you guys are engaged to be married because you are planning a WEDDING aka you are getting married LOL!

If he is 100% still ok with you planning than I say go for it! The marriage is what you want more than anything else so the ring will come in it’s time!

Post # 9
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

We have two friends who got engaged last year and she JUST got the ring. They both mutually decided to start planning the wedding and they set a date. He said the ring would come eventually (when he had more money saved), and it did. They’re getting married this summer, so it came with plenty of time left ๐Ÿ™‚

I would confirm with your Boyfriend or Best Friend that you are, in fact, deciding to set a date, and then just start planning away.

Post # 10
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

That’s a tough call.  I would call the venue and ask if the date is open and how much it is to reserve the date.  Then I would tell him that if he was serious about your convo the other night then you both need to go and sign a contract with them and put money down.

Post # 12
Member
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

we’ll likely be booking our venue pre-ring too. I don’t think it’s so unusual.

Post # 13
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

hmmmm – what sort of personality is if if you were to give him a timeline and say that you require certain things to happen by a certain date?  meaning you have ready dated for five years and TWO years ago you picked out rings and there is still nothing in regards to a date and his story is he doesnt want to rush anything   you are one heck of a patient woman!

Post # 14
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Hi Abee, my thought is you need to decide what’s most important to you at this point. If you’ve already been ‘waiting’ 5 years, still aren’t engaged and haven’t gotten the green light to book your venue, think about how much longer you’re willing to wait. Because just practically speaking, it’s a bad idea to book the venue if you don’t know 100% if you’re engaged.

Also, put things into perspective a little. Don’t let the wedding overshadow the marriage. You say things like “My perfect date” “My perfect venue”. Don’t forget, there wouldn’t be a date and a venue without your SO. Maybe if you relax a little you’ll be able to think with a clear head and figure out what’s best for you.

Im like Eloping – I would have told him to pack his bags. But I also have a strong personality and am super sensitive about dating too long before getting engaged. I’d be happier breaking up than waiting longer than I was comfortable. To each her own.

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