(Closed) Vent…rude people who RSVP and not show up

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
3169 posts
Sugar bee

OP I am so sorry that happened to you. That is a lot of no shows. I too would be angry, hurt, and disappointed. 

As far as th photographer, given what you’ve said it’s extremely unlikely he would produce anything I would be willing to pay for. I would wait and see the pics and make a judgement call on whether you got what was promised.

Post # 18
1365 posts
Bumble bee

Wow, that is a ton of no-shows. I’m sorry. πŸ™ That’s really rude and I’d be super hurt, too. I probably wouldn’t say anything, but I’d be reconsidering my friendship with those people.

As for the photographer, that’s unprofessional but sadly what can happen when you go with friends as vendors. Hopefully you’ll get some good photos out of it. I’m not sure what you can really do about that. If you don’t get photos you like, and it’s in your budget, maybe you could pay a different photographer for a portrait session? 

For the DJ, that sucks. I think all you can do is leave factual reviews about your negative experience. I relied super heavily on reviews so I would be glad to know that she was so off the mark.

Post # 19
7200 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

Woah. 22 no-shows is a LOT. I had almost 200 guests and only 2 no-shows. That is absolutely insane. 

Unfortunately, there’s not much to be done about it. I wouldn’t be inviting them anywhere anytime soon and they’d probably be off the Christmas card list because I’d be pissed, but talking to them about it isn’t going to solve anything. 

Post # 20
236 posts
Helper bee

Oh hell nahhhh I would not be able to hold my tongue. You should write them thank you cards: thank you for rsvping and not showing up. πŸ–•πŸ»πŸ–•πŸ»πŸ–•πŸ»πŸ–•πŸ»

Post # 21
2554 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

MRSsrm85 :  Haha oh man, I love that people actually took that seriously, it makes me a little too happy.

Personally I’d have all 22 guests killed by ninja assasins then stuffed taxidermy-style and seated at 8-person round tables simulating my wedding so they could look like they were in attendance till the end of time.  Totally not kidding…

Post # 22
12123 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

IMO there is nothing ruder. I’d call to see if everything is OK. You were expecting them at the wedding and when you didn’t hear from them afterwards, you feared the very worst. It sends a message without lecturing or accusing them of anything. 

It may sound passive aggressive, but occasionally it’s true. 

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