(Closed) Vent: the venue is minimizing how they messed up

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
10366 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think you may be sliding down a slippery slope and losing grip on what’s most important about your wedding.

If you had multiple stations, plus dinner, plus a dessert buffet, nobody went hungry. Your dad is getting some money back. You have the opportunity to review them on the web. I think that’s a reasonably good resolution to the situation. Stop dwelling on things you can’t change that nobody will remember in the long run, and bask in being married!

Post # 4
3126 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

@crayfish:  agreed.

 @carolsdaughter:  You have started multiple posts on weddingbee about how upset you are about things that went wrong at your wedding. For your own sake you need to start looking past those mishaps and start focusing on the important things- like you are now married to your husband! I had things go wrong too, I think most brides do, but it is important to let things go. I guarentee the majority of your guests had no idea things did not go as you had planned. Time to move on and start making new memories. I promise in a year these things won’t matter! 

Post # 5
13290 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think you just need to chalk this up to experience, and move on. Don’t dwell on the things that didn’t go right, and focus on the things that did.  You got married to the man you loved, and had lots of people there to celebrate with you.


Post # 6
6221 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

Your dwelling on this issue is causing you more harm than whatever the venue did. It doesn’t really matter that guests couldn’t get this dessert or that appetizer. I’m sure they had other things to choose from. Accept the refund and move on.

Post # 7
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Did you have in your contract the number of pieces/refills you would get?  It sounds like no one went hungry or missed out on tastey treats (and believe me, if Aunt Myrtle didn’t get her fill of dessert, you’d hear about it!)  If its not explicitly stated in the contract, you probably have no case.  Do what PPs suggest – review them on the review sites, and enjoy married life.

Post # 8
4419 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@crayfish:  I was thinking the same thing. 


@carolsdaughter:  Not to sound unsympathetic. I’m not sure why you were worrying about it at your reception. Someone else should have been given the responsibility to make sure things were being done correctly.  Even so, at this point, you’re focusing on the wrong thing. The wedding is over. Let it go and get on with enjoying married life.  

Post # 9
11270 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@MissTatas:  exactly what i was thinking.


@carolsdaughter:  weddings are not perfect.  it’s over, you need to move on.  you should be enjoying marital bliss.

Post # 10
15 posts
  • Wedding: November 2012

Was the food mishap a genuine damper on the day? If this could have been avoided (which it could have) by proper planning on the hotel’s behalf and effcient staff to refill the food stations, I believe you are entitled to some compensation. The best thing to do is to arrange a meeting with your husband and the hotel’s manager and perhaps the wedding coordinator. Explain your side and let the hotel explain theirs. There must be a mutually satisfying outcome to this scenario. If the hotel are unwilling to refund too much money, they should offer you a complimentary stay and dine voucher or something else which can make up for the upset THEIR lack of planning, attention and staff efficiency resulted in your day.

Post # 12
2359 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

my only thing would be to ask….. how much food was contracted??  venues don’t supply unlimited food all night unless you pay for all that.  There is usually a certain amount for cocktail hour, dinner, dessert, late night etc.   So i guess it depends what was in your contract.  Even if it’s buffet you still only get the amount of food that would cover x amount of people there so maybe guests were taking more of their fair share….



Post # 14
4419 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@carolsdaughter:  Good plan!  I bet the rest of day was incredible!  BTW, Congratulations!!!!!!!

Post # 15
5956 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

I’m familiar with all the things that didn’t go as well as you would have liked on your day, it’s time to decide how far you want to take things.  You spoke with the vendor, they offered a token refund, is that shitty?  YUUUUPP!  Is there anything else you can do about it, other than post reviews on every bridal site there is?  NOOOOOPE!

If it were me, I would take my refund, go buy some champagne, make a lovely dinner, stare into the eyes of my husband and remind myself that I don’t really care about much other than this man and the fact that it’s him and me for the rest of my life, regardless of what my wedding guests ate or did not eat.

Post # 16
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I can relate to the stress of other people complaining. After my first wedding, my ex-mother in law bitched constantly about how she didn’t get to eat her fuit cup (they put it out during cocktail hour or something along with the appetizers). She chose to dance instead. Before dinner, they cleared the tables of any plates left over, dirty and clean, to prepare for the meal. Then there was the fact that the staff was a little too efficient about clearing the glasses while she was out dancing. She didn’t like that she had to keep going to the bar to get more wine even though her class was CLEARLY nearly full (which I kind of doubt). She also complained about the DJ (who did suck, but I let it go).

She (and other people) who constantly harped on the negatives really stressed me out. Eventually, I pointed out that we were married, which was the important part. Of course, I also bought the ex-mil a case of canned fruit cocktail for Christmas one year 🙂

Don’t let it get you down. Sounds like there’s at least some sort of resolution. As someone else said, you can review them online. Focus on the great parts of your day and try not to let the rest of this bother you. =)

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