(Closed) VENT VENT VENT I’m so mad!!!!!

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
10851 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@Bostonsmom: Do you have to go to this wedding? Are you close to your cousin? Becasue you could always tell her that $2000 is too much for you guys considering that your own wedding is soon!

Post # 4
Member
275 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I agree with Bakerella if you arent close I would explain with all the expenses in your life it just isnt the best time for you to go right now.

Post # 5
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

I agree w/ bakerella – if you don’t have the money to go to this wedding b/c of your own, then it might be your way out of this.

Post # 6
Member
5890 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

solution: just hubby goes.  it’s his cousin.

Post # 7
Member
4771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

your Fiance can go alone, its his family.

Post # 9
Member
4771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Bostonsmom:

Have your BM’s planned anything yet?  if they made deposits it would be really bad of you to cancel, you should tell your Fiance this, that its not fair to your Bridesmaid or Best Man.

Post # 10
Member
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I understand that you’re disappointed, and I’m sorry that it upsets your plans. But you need to keep in mind that the cousin has not actually done anything wrong.  Destination weddings are expensive, yes; but the people having them generally understand that not everyone will be able to make it due to price, time, etc. Further, the idea that a weekend would be off limits because there’s a local festival going on is simply absurd.  Did she even know you were planning on having your party that weekend?

(Also, I’d let go of any resentment you have about her engagement timing – presumably her Fiance asked her, not the other way around, so she couldn’t control the timing even if she did have reason to think you would be getting engaged around the same time.)

Post # 11
Member
3758 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I agree, if neither of you are very close to his cousin I would just say that $2000 is too much since you are saving for your wedding.

Post # 12
Member
10851 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@Bostonsmom: Okay, after throwing the Honeymoon in there I would not go. That sucks. I think for a cousin that’s a bit removed to be “expected” to go to a destination wedding. Is your Fiance close to his cousin? As far as budgeting goes, I would consider my own Honeymoon to be more of a priority than attending someone else’s Destination Wedding.

Post # 13
Member
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@Bostonsmom:

In that case, it sounds like this is an issue between you and your Fiance, not his cousin.  Have you told him, calmly, how much you feel like you’d be losing out on (money, bachelorette, honeymoon) by going to this wedding?

Post # 14
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I probably wouldn’t go–$2,000 is a lot of money! And considering you got an invite OVER FACEBOOK?!?! I mean, that’s just wrong. I’d just send a gift. I’d have to be really close to someone to fly to Mexico during an off season.

Also, if it came down to our honeymoon or her wedding, it’d be our honeymoon all the way

How come you can’t have your staggette, though? Are all the BMs going to the wedding? If not, have it anyways

Post # 16
Member
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

oh boy that REALLY sucks!  i feel for you.  i have had some things not go my way during my planning and it is all very disappointing.  the best thing you can do is learn to live with it and accept that life is always what we want, but you can make the best out of whatever situation you are in.   but first take the time you need to be angry, mad, frustrated. it will get better somehow.

i am not overwhelmed with emotion like you so already i can start brainstorming….like do you HAVE to go this other wedding for a full week?  if her wedding is a on a weekend, just go for the weekend, or half the week!  your stagette is only one day, so you don’t necessarily need to be in town the whole week, do you?   talk to your Fiance, explain in a calm and rational manner that it was super important to you, and ask if you can work out something so you are BOTH happy.

The topic ‘VENT VENT VENT I’m so mad!!!!!’ is closed to new replies.

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