(Closed) Very embarrassing and TMI, try not to poke fun

posted 6 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
839 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I don’t think any of your bullet points are very good indicators of tightness. Why would you expect every guy to tell you that you are tight? That is not a typical thing for guys to say during sex. For that matter, why would you expect any gynocologist to tell you this? I’ve never even heard of a gynocologist saying this, and if my gyno said this to me, I’d be super creeped out. All it means is that you probably have a doctor that isn’t a completely unprofessional weirdo.

Sex isn’t supposed to hurt. If sex doesn’t hurt for you, the only thing that means is that you’re totally normal. Same thing with tampons. Tampons are created WITH THE PURPOSE of easily going in, no matter what size they are.

I think you’re really over thinking this. At the VERY least, you are totally normal.

Post # 4
8442 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@anon00:  From someone who has the opposite problem, let me tell you, the grass isn’t always greener.  If I’m not careful and prepared, I get cuts and tears that sting (sorry TMI), so it’s not fun.  Also, just because you’re a little looser down there, doesn’t mean your bf isn’t enjoying himself, you’re probably imagining it’s far worse than what it really is (we’re always our own worst critics).  If you’re really concerned, I’ve heard of women doing kegal exercises to help “improve” that area, but I don’t have any experience with this.

Post # 5
144 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Girl, you need to relax. NONE of the points you listed are proof or evidence that your va jay jay is loose or tight. it has to do with so many things, including the size of your man’s penis. Just because your gyno isn’t remarking on your tightness and tampons fit the way they should, DOES NOT mean you have a gaping hole of misery or whatever silly thing you said. If your guy is having sex with you every day or quite often, he obviously has no complaints on the state of your down town area. I know it’s your anxiety talking, but really, this is nothing to worry about. If you enjoy sex and everything feels good, that’s what matters 🙂

Post # 7
5000 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

This kind of sounds like body dismorphic disorder. Have you been to counseling for your anxiety?

Post # 8
1684 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

You are completely normal.

Guys don’t compliment girls on their tightness.  They take it as a given.  Besides, have you ever been with a guy who has been with a woman who has given birth?  I’m assuming not, which means 23 year olds are all they’ve ever known.

Sex shouldn’t be uncomfortable after the first couple of times.  And yes, you should be able to use larger-sized tampons after having sex.

And finally, I would find any gyno commenting on my muscles or tightness to be really unprofessional.  I’d be annoyed to hear them complain or compliment me on it, it’s just very awkward and weird.

Keep up the kegels, if just for your own increased pleasure at sex Smile

Post # 9
2638 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2006

WHAT? I think this is seriously all in your head. I don’t think all guys say that to girls and I have never, EVER had a gyno comment on tightness of any kind. I mean, they’ve had to tell me to relax and that I’m tensing/tightening up and making it difficult for them, but “Your vaginal canal is so teeny?” WTF?

Post # 10
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@anon00:  I think you are wayyyy overthinking this. lol I have never heard a guy make a comment about a girl being tight or not, esp at our age (24), nor a doctor. Its not really something that most people, that I know, talk about. Im sure you are perfectly fine and its all in your head. Also, your Boyfriend or Best Friend prob would have never even considered it until you brought it up. I think you need to stop asking people and just let it go.

Post # 12
8483 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

@housebee:  This. I dont even enjoy sex for the first few minutes because it hurts so bad. Fiance always feels bad because I wince really bad when he’s sticking it in.

Post # 13
196 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I’d like to throw the suggestion out that perhaps your cervix is just longer than others. I recently had a miscarraige, I was told that I had a very short cervix. I never heard it before, but I talked to some friends who said theirs were ‘further up’ so certain positions didn’t bump against the cervix like with me it does, which does give a painful feeling at certian points. So I’m not sure if that is what you are hoping for in the pain dept of sex haha.

I’ve NEVER heard that a gyno says ‘oh you’re so tight!’, that would be out of line. So, I think your friends might be just saying that, it doesn’t sound right that someone would say that. Also, I’ve never heard anyone say a tampon wouldn’t go in- they are made for comfort NOT to notice they are in you.

Don’t think you’re any different than what people online tell you they are. You are perfectly normal. From what I know, sex isn’t supposed to hurt, and if it does then something is wrong. If you’re worried about the tight feeling for your boyfriend, perhaps buy a We-Vibe, we have one and it makes it incredibly tight in there. Also, perhaps try positions like spooning, or from behing with your legs between his, this would give that added tightness. I don’t think you need it though!

Post # 14
8442 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@anon00:  I really don’t think your guy is going to leave you.  By your logic, your man would be much happier than mine (I can’t have sex with him daily).  Is there some reason you think your man would leave you?  Most men don’t want to see their partners uncomfortable/in pain during sex, but rather, enjoying themselves.  You both deserve to feel good and loved during sex.  The fact that tampons fit you normally, the gynecologist says your normal and sex is comfortable for you means that you’re normal.  Please don’t feel like you should suffer just to keep someone happy, you deserve better than that.

Post # 15
2389 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Honestly?  I would be weirded out if my gyno said ANYTHING about the size of my vag!!!  And you say that these doctors “compliment” your friends?  That might be a violation of professional standards it’s so gross.  If there are any physicians on here I’d love to hear your opinion.

Post # 16
3697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m going to comment here so I remember to come back and tell you about my own ladybits once I decide if you’re for real. 

The topic ‘Very embarrassing and TMI, try not to poke fun’ is closed to new replies.

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