- 5 years ago
I am recently engaged and just started planning my wedding, and I think my biggest problem right now is deciding what to do about my stepdad. My stepdad is a transgender who is going through hormonal therapy, and surgery soon, to become a woman. I respect his choice to do that and to stay with my mom. I am very open minded, and I don’t care what he does as long as my mom’s happy. However, he is VERY obnoxious about making everything all about him for shock value. Recently, he’s made many overly sexual comments towards me and others and dresses inappropriately. He is also a pathological liar and is constantly insulting people’s accomplishments to try to make himself feel better. All that being said, as crazy as he can be, he’s always tried to be there for me in his own weird way. I know that if I don’t invite him to my wedding, my mom will be devistated and probably not come herself, as well as hold it against me for a VERY long time, but I don’t want him harrassing my other guests. He literally “came out” at my cousin’s wedding just to make the day all about him (his words, not mine). I have considered inviting him and telling him and my mom, as politely/nicely as possible that our wedding is going to be a small intimate one so that we can celebrate this big step in our lives with our friends and people who love us and (because he makes a big show/fit/scene at every big family event) I love you guys, but I’m asking that you PLEASE please agree to not make a scene at my wedding and if you do, I would really hate for this to happen, but I’ll ask you to leave. It just sounds so harsh and ugly, but I don’t know what else to do. Any advice?