(Closed) VERY PERSONAL…. upset (too much information too…. lol)

posted 11 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Congrats on losing weight! Seriously, give yourself a pat on the back, many women out there would love to be in your shoes right now.  Your body went through a complete change, you just have to get use to it.  Plus, your hubby loves the way you are! I have stretch marks all over my butt and stomach from having 2 kids and it grosses me out everytime i look in the mirror at it but Fiance says he loves it and it was for him so I embrace it! Dont be too hard on yourself, you did an amazing thing

Post # 18
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m sorry you are feeling down, I can sympathize with you like many other women here. What might help you in the bedroom is buying cute lingerie that covers areas you aren’t so comfortable showing. Fredricks of Hollywood has some good ones, I wear the corsets that have the lace going around it so it covers my tummy and sucks in everyhting I don’t want coming out. It made me start to feel relaxed and may help you. The most important hting though is that your man loves you and finds you beautiful so just think about that when you are feeling down.  SUPER HUG!

Post # 19
Member
18628 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Congrats on the weight loss.  I’m sorry that you feel bad about the way that you look but I’m sure that you Fiance thinks you are hot stuff!

Post # 20
Member
5262 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

Great job on the weight loss! 

I think it’ll just take time for your body to adjust. Losing a lot of weight often leads to extra “baggy” skin, which can feel gross, but will adjust as time passes. In the meantime, I would focus on toning up and making yourself feel beautiful – invest in a new hair cut/style, buy some pretty lingerie, etc. 

And listen to your FI! I know it’s hard, but he loves what he sees, and I bet he can help you feel sexy. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 21
Member
5976 posts
Bee Keeper

First…congratulations on losing the weight! That’s awesome, and you should be very proud of yourself!

Second, I know that it’s hard to love every aspect of the way you look, and it absolutely doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks but yourself, but I know what you mean about wanting to look good for your Fiance. I have abnormally large boobs for my frame, and my old boyfriend used to tell me that was the one thing he wished he could change about me. It was terrible b/c he knew how sensitive I was about the issue, yet he told me that anyway.

Then I found my husband. It’s so wonderful to know that there’s someone out there who loves you whether you are large, medium or small, b/c it’s not only a physical attraction, but also the emotional one. Your Fiance sees you as beautiful inside and outside, and that’s definitely something fabulous to have. Try to see yourself through his eyes, and don’t worry so much about your appearances. HE obviously loves them, and you should too!

I do agree with everyone above in that you should also talk to your doctor to see if there’s anything natural you can do about firming things up. You’ll be surprised at what they can provide to you.

Good luck, and congrats again!!!

Post # 24
Member
1041 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Wow, congrats on such an accomplishment! Echoing the advice of others, I’d definitely check into toning exercises.

Post # 25
Member
1102 posts
Bumble bee

I’m sorry you’re feeling this way ๐Ÿ™ I think it’s quite common. A friend of mine has lost 35 kg in the last year or 2, obviously she is happy she did it and feels much healthier and better in herself. But she does say it feels really unfair to finally be a size 10, to be able to wear “normal” clothes and feel “normal” and yet not like the way she looks naked!!! It does seem unfair. I agree with talking to your dr, maybe doing some weight training, and focusing on some self-love, perhaps by talking to a counsellor. All the best ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 27
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I know how you feel about feelin huge when you are skinny. All through junior high I was over weight and then in high school I started losing the weight. By the time I graduated college I was a size 2 weight about 120lbs! (I was 180 in the 5th grade!) and I’m 5’6 1/2. So even though I was stick thin I was felt like I was big. It was weird I know! 5 yrs later Ive gained about 20lbs and people tell me I look better now bcuz I have curves. I of course miss being that tiny and still want to lose 10-15! It’s crazy. Just stay strong and try to see the positive in yourself.

Post # 29
Member
5262 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I hate that! I get it all the time. I lost 40 lbs in middle school/high school, and am down to a healthy weight. Some days (months) are better than others, but I’m consistently a size 2-4. I don’t eat as much as my family and R’s family (but they are mostly overweight, and prefer huge serving sizes) and they constantly bug me about my “expensive” food choice – read: organic when I can afford it – and say, “you’re not the one that has to lose weight, I am” or whatever if I’m not eating a sweet or second helping when they are. It’s like people think they have a right to pick you to pieces! 

PS: You look stunning!

Post # 31
Member
5262 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I honestly think it’s good to splurge once in awhile. I feel like that’s how I’ve kept the weight off, and I bet it’s the same for you – lifestyle change wins every time over fad diet in the long run!

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