- 1 year ago
I wrote a post talking about feeling lonely and lost in my marriage. I got amazing advice and I’m really grateful for this outlet to discuss these issues with. There’s one area though that I’m really curious about and want to probe further: Video games.
I discussed in my last post that video games are a huge problem in our relationship. He’s always been a gamer, but I feel like it’s worsened. When we first moved together we lived in the tiniest apartment with one TV in our living room. He would game in the evenings and days off sometimes, but it was never for outrageous periods of time and we had the living room together so I was always right there. When we moved into our new home (literally one month before getting engaged), we had an extra spare bedroom so I thought it would be fun for him to have his own “man cave.” I noticed the gaming increasing substantially, but I attributed it to the stress of the wedding. We’ve been married for 6 months, and I find it’s the same if not worse. He can game for hours on end with no problem. He’ll eat meals while gaming. He’ll come home from work, I’ll get a brief hello, and then it’s right to his game room for who knows how long. Our communication sucks too, I feel like I get nothing from him (“uh huhs” or just brief sentences, I really don’t remember the last time we had a conversation uninterrupted by screens). Yet, he’s so excited an animated when he talks to his gaming friends when he games. I tried to discuss this but I feel like he either isn’t taking me seriously or feels like what he’s doing is completely normal. Nothings changed, and I have never felt so alone.
Bees, do your boyfriends or husbands game? Do they need nagging or prompting from you to get off the game? What do you do together (that isn’t gaming) to keep your relationship interesting (I feel like he gets bored and anxious when not playing)? I just don’t know how much longer I can handle feeling so alone and sad.
Thanks so much for reading.