Post # 1

Member
966 posts
Busy bee
So what did will you do about vows? Fiance wants us to write our own, but I’m too nervous. haha. I’m afraid they won’t be as good, or they’ll be too mushy, plus I REALLY HATE speaking in front of people! Plus… I just don’t want anyone to hear thise things… I feel they’re private and it’d be kind of awkward. I’m so shy. haha. what do you plan or doing, or did you do?
Post # 3

Member
1193 posts
Bumble bee
I suggested writing our on own vows. He’s hesitant. I just liked the idea because we’re eloping So its Just him and I. I figure there’s no need to be nervous. Plus it seems to go more with the intimate feeling we want. I’m terribly nervous about writing them though!
Post # 4

Member
28 posts
Newbee
I actually asked my hunny if he wanted to write our own, thinking that he wouldn’t want to (he’s not always great with words) but he said he did want to write his own. I think if you’re really uncomfortable with it because you feel it’s too private, then you shouldn’t! It’s your big day! But if it’s because you’re shy, maybe practice infront of other people. I’m super shy too and I know I’ll be nervous, but all the things I have to say come from my heart and I don’t mind anyone else hearing them.
Post # 5

Member
379 posts
Helper bee
We wrote our own. It was incredibly touching and a fun experience. We went back and forth for a while on how much to write… after deciding on a page he wrote THREE pages… and didn’t tell me.
I love the idea of writing your own vows. I mean, the point of a wedding is to publicly promise in front of family and friends to love this person forever right? Why be shy about how awesome you make each other feel?
Honestly, no one will remember what you said in your vows. Only you and your husband will be looking back and what you wrote/said. The guests will hear it and be touched, but I doubt they will be listening that closely.
Post # 6

Member
4439 posts
Honey bee
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
@yanamari: We wanted something more personal than the standard vows, but didn’t want to write our own because we’re too self-conscious and unimaginative… so we looked up a few different options online and copy-pastad what we liked. So we will both be reading the same thing.
Post # 7

Member
310 posts
Helper bee
yanamari We are having a catholic mass wedding so we are not allowed to write our own vows but we did get to choose between two diffrent traditional vows. we chose this one ” I____ take you____to be my wife/husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life. I personally think thats beautiful. And see myself tearing up when I say the last part of it. We are however going to write each other letters to read right before the ceramony (kinda like writing our own vows but in a personal letter to each other) and have them hand delived to each other by a bidesmaid/groomsman (since we dont wanna see each other before the wedding)
Post # 8

Member
2359 posts
Buzzing bee
we wrote our own, and since we are both a nervous wreck speaking in front of people, we decided to exchange vows around a corner before the ceremony, and it was a great photo oportunity too. then we just had the Justice of the Peace mention a little blurb in the ceremony about how we already exchanged our vows.


Post # 9

Member
310 posts
Helper bee
@yanamari: My Darling Husband and I wrote our but together. So we wrote them together and then each said them to each other. I knew I’d be too nervous/emotional trying to say something that he hadn’t heard yet. This was a nice way for us to say personally written vows with less pressure. Also, I loved writing them with him. I was bawling my eyes out!
Post # 10

Member
502 posts
Busy bee
I want us to write our own. My Fiance was opposed to the idea saying people don’t really do that but people totally do! Now I think he’s on board with doing it. I just want to do something sweet & basic cause I’m also nervous about being in front of people too and I think I’ll be crying! If he’s struggling with it then I might see if he just wants us to both say the same vows but still write them ourselves so they’re unique.
Post # 11

Member
502 posts
Busy bee
@MrsAMac: That’s so nice! That’s what I was thinking!
Post # 12

Member
4952 posts
Honey bee
We just did the basic, standard/traditional ones. We didn’t have any interest in writing our own. The standard ones covered what we needed. 😉
Post # 13

Member
203 posts
Helper bee
We’re writing our own too, Fiance is nervous because he’s super shy in front others. I can’t believe however that he has already written his vows and I haven’t even started and I was the one that suggested it and we still have 1.5 yrs to go.
Post # 14

Member
8472 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
We did the standard ones too. I thought of writing our own, but I knew my husband didn’t really want to do it (too nervous I think) so I never brought it up again.
Post # 15

Member
5965 posts
Bee Keeper
Ours were an Emily Bronte-esque homage to the traditional vows that focused on trusting each other and what we knew to carry us through the future, I knew I was going to be choked up, so we did the Howdy Doody routine, where the officiant read them, asked us if we agreed, we said “I do” and that was that.
Post # 16

Member
200 posts
Helper bee
We wanted to make the same vows to each other but not use something traditional — so we wrote our own together. It might be a good compromise — you still get to write your vows, but they won’t be so private that they are awkward to say in front of others.