(Closed) Wait, its one more thing to look forward to :)

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
930 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m curious, why are you posting this?  

Post # 4
1014 posts
Bumble bee

I respectfully disagree.

Post # 5
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@michellelee1228:  I used to think like you. And then I got married. 

Post # 6
1409 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

I’m still glad I lived with my husband before getting married 🙂

Post # 7
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Thanks for sharing. Moving in after marriage will also be more stressful. It’s not a fairytale it’s a big adjustment that for us (a couple who never fights) came with quite a few fights the first few months of living together. I’m glad we got that our of our system before we got married so it didn’t overshadow our newlywed bliss!


you may have a different opinion once you actually experience it.


Post # 8
905 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

As my mother said when I informed her that Fiance and I were moving in together: “But you’ll learn all his bad habits.” Yes. Yes, I will. Better now than after we’ve signed documents uniting us until the end of our lives. [Also your justification of years is just silly. Fiance and I moved in together at the 3 year mark. Will be married at the 7 year mark. To each her own.]

Post # 9
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@JulietFoxtrot:  +1

@michellelee1228:  Everyone is different. There is no blanket solution or right thing to do in this topic. Just because it works for you, doesn’t mean it is the right thing for everyone else.

I have always had the vague want to be married before I lived with a partner, however that’s not the way it worked out. My Fiance and I live together in a house we own, and that’s the perfect scenario for us. I’m still excited to be getting married to him, and our lives will still change for the better after our wedding.

Bravo to you for being in a situation that you feel is the right choice for you and your partner, but please don’t try to force your views on other people when it may not be the right choice for them.

Post # 10
25 posts

… Thanks for sharing?

Post # 11
107 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I’m glad we live together now, we’ve ironed out a lot of wrinkles and I know our first year of marriage will be way more enjoyable.  Happy for you that you’ve done things your way and it’s working for you, but this is a really weird way to introduce yourself to the forum. 

Post # 12
2564 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@JulietFoxtrot:  This.  I am sorry, but with one of us moving to another state before getting engaged, moving in together was the perfect situation for us.  Plus I am glad we’ve lived together first.  Gives us time to work out the kinks…lol

Post # 13
4698 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

You’re actually comparing it to test driving a car, no one in their right mind would buy a car without taking it for a test drive.

Also, why would someone trust your opinion? You can know someone inside and out, but it’s absolutely true that you really don’t know them until you live with them. You’ll see.


Post # 14
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I love living with my Fiance and I expect it to be the same after we are married. Why miss out on all for years waiting? Plus, I am so glad I lived with an ex. He was a complete lazy slob and I am glad I found out before it went any further. If we had not lived together and had married I would be stuck cleaning up after him to this day. Nightmare! 

Post # 16
275 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I also have to respectfully disagree. To each their own, but my two cents is it’s best to live together prior to marriage. I say always “test drive the car” before you buy it.

 I moved in with my now fiance after 1.5 years of dating. There was definitely an adjustment. Even when I stayed every night at his and his roomates’s place and they were digusting boys, I somehow thought he would be different once we moved in together. I thought he’d like to clean like me. Wrong. We definitely had many fights over housework. It went on for a few years. There was a point when I questioned if I could handle the fact that he leaves his drawers open after he pulls clothes out every day. I had to make a choice whether or not those things were that important. You can make yourself crazy obsessing over those things. I chose to stop, and it seemed simutaneously he made a choice to make more of an effort. In the end it all worked out and here we are over 7.5 years together and getting married in 56 days. I guess my point is that if we had been married through all that there would have been so much more pressure and I don’t know if it would’ve worked. I’m looking forward to marriage because we’ve already dealt with all that crap and we can just be happy.

The topic ‘Wait, its one more thing to look forward to :)’ is closed to new replies.

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