(Closed) Waiting advice

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
541 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I hear you. My Fiance and I met in high school and it took 10 years of being together before he popped the question.

You need to talk instead of posting here! Communication is key to a good marriage. Maybe he doesn’t realize how you feel about these manners. Sometimes guys need a little push.


Post # 4
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I don’t mean to get your hopes up here, but are you sure he’s not just trying to throw you off the scent? Shortly before my Fiance proposed, he pulled some of that horse poop … lucky for me ever since he told me I wasn’t getting the digital camera I wanted for Xmas and got it, I always consider the possibility he wants to surprise me.

Now lets say he’s really not planning it any time soon … I think you are doing the right thing. Just keep watching those wedding shows without putting any verbal/direct pressure on him to get married. You can bring it up lighty if it really concerns you right now (sans ultimatums etc.) just so long as he gets the hint without feeling forced I think you’ll get what you want soon.

Post # 5
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I think if it’s really bothering you and making you upset, you need to talk to him. I know you don’t want to pressure him, so I don’t advocate any sort of ultimatums or confrontations. But I would tell him, you’re really hurting and you want to know what he really wants. If you knew he needed like, 2 years but after that he’d be ready to get married, would that help? I know for me, at one point I just needed a general timeline and then I felt better.

It just sounds like you guys are on different pages, an open conversation on what you both want might help. You might need to compromise and find a middle ground, if you can.

Good luck!

Post # 6
898 posts
Busy bee

I’m engaged, but my Fiance says stuff like that to me all the time. He’s so worried about the money and paying for a wedding, that he doesn’t want to even watch those shows with me. I agree with JeanL1984, talk about it, maybe he can at least give you a timeline.  

Post # 7
82 posts
Worker bee

I would also advocate talking to him about this, most importantly because you have a son together!  I’m scratching my head as to why you wouldn’t have talked a long time ago about what your plans are for the future, and I think that you should definitely bring it up now.

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