(Closed) Waiting Bees – how much pre-engagement wedding prep have you done??

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
16195 posts
Honey Beekeeper

As long as you and your boyfriend are both cool with your plans, I don’t see the harm. My suggestion would just be to remember that many things that you have semi-planned right now will probably change, at least a little bit, once your wedding officially draws nearer.

I didn’t plan anything before I was engaged, but I did have a longer engagement (2+ years). So, for example, the guest list I created at the beginning of our engagement was not at all the guest list we had a year and a half later when we were actually mailing save the dates.

So just be flexible in the plans you already made, but it sounds like you’re off to a great start!

Post # 4
1144 posts
Bumble bee

@Quinlan:  I have done some of the things you listed! I have a guest list on my phone and an excel spreadsheet. I’ve got potential first dance songs, I have looked at tent, chair, table & heater rentals. Prior to deciding we were going to have it an my Nanna’s farm I was looking at reception sites. I already have my colors picked out. Have bridesmaids in mind (looking at ways to ask them). Tentatively have a date picked out. Found some dresses that I need to try on, tried one on. Ha! Now I’m waiting on SO to propose….

Post # 5
1848 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Since SO is not as much of a planner as I am (I’m a Virgo, nobody can beat me in planning!), I have looked at things. However, I will not make any official price inqueries without his input and without him putting a ring on it. We can plan together, but I can do the recon first.

I’ve looked at venues since most of my family is in another state and I want to figure out logistics. PA? NJ? Neutral state? I also have looked at photographers. Other than that, I have been drooling over rings and dresses.

Post # 6
3823 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I have a venue on contract. We are inviting family and friends from another country and to assist them with getting travel visas and making arrangements, we had to set a date and pick a venue to put on the invitation (we’re sending it to the embassy with a list of guests). Other than that, I just looked at a few photographers, and inquired about some DJs’ quotes and got an idea of what I want centerpieces to look like. I’ve identified a few dress styles that I think I like, but of course, I have to see how they look on me first before determining the exact style I will wear.


Oh! And in some sort of drunken form of excitement, I made an appointment at a bridal salon to check out a sample sale after the holidays. Then anxiety and sadness hit and I told my SO that I’m going to cancel the appointment because I refuse to try on dresses without a ring. I don’t want to look like some crazy woman whose only holding on to some false pretense of hope. He told me not to cancel it. I kept saying that I will and just looked at me in my eyes and said “DON’T!” 

That made me feel better… buuuut, I still don’t like this wait. If he’s waiting until the holiday, well then these are THE longest days of my entire life! 

Post # 7
628 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

No bare in mind I’ve gotten the ok from my SO to check things out. He has the ring and I think he’s planning on asking soon. I’ve picked out colors a semi completed guest list. We both agreed on having the ceremony where his sisters board their horses. The owner is super nice. She told his sisters that we could have it there. It was cute though when we went to see it for the first time he was planning as well saying things we could have this here and that there. It made my heart leap for joy!

Post # 8
3420 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

My SO and I have mutually decided on a tentative location for the ceremony, picked out our bridal party (3 each) and worked up a guest list. we are also talking about music for the party. We have a friend who DJs but since we are artist we were weighing the options of setting up a band space to Jam.

But on my own I have been: working on the wording of our invites & looking at dresses for myself and my ladies.

I will wait until things are offically offical to get my mom involved. I am really waiting to draw up a real budget when things are offically official and the just engaged buzz wears off

Post # 9
1069 posts
Bumble bee

Originally I thought we were getting married this winter so I found a location and most of the vendors. I didn’t do any dress shopping but I already decided how I want my hair (my hairdresser is one of my best friends)

Post # 10
4047 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@Quinlan:  Dang, girl. You’re hardcore. The only thing I’ve really done is decide who I would want to invite if we go the small wedding route (rather than a private ceremony between just the two of us). I guess I also know purple will be in my wedding. And I’ve thrown around some venue ideas, and I’ve looked up some photographers.

Totally not any details though. I’m having enough trouble narrowing down my general vision of elopement vs. small hometown wedding vs. destination wedding, etc.

Post # 11
482 posts
Helper bee

just wow at your list :0 and i agree with gemstone, things could change. heck im not engaged yet and im already realizing a change in our plans. we went from small wedding idea to eloping. so i guess you can say we’re on the fence with our future plans.

Post # 12
279 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@Quinlan:  Wow…I feel like a slacker looking at your list! LOL

I have decided on the engagement photos location and photographer (proposal is happening before Christmas, but not taking engagement photos until the spring). I’ve also chosen my wedding colors and have a couple of venues in mind for tours next month. That’s all I have!

Post # 13
279 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@sealevels: Another Virgo checking in…I am going to take.this.wedding.down. haha

Post # 14
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I have a lot of stuff planned in my head, tons of stuff saved on my computer such as DIYs I plan to do, various ideas.  I have also researched venues and have one I’m hoping for.  SO knows this (though he hasn’t seen my pinterest or saved ideas, he’s not all that interested in flowers and stuff and would forget anything I showed him this early).

I think as long as you and SO are on the same page it’s totally fine to go nuts with pre-engagment planning.

Post # 15
9 posts

I’ve only managed to alert my family what they’ll be paying for exactly. I’ve narrowed it down to my aunt paying for the pre-marital counseling, the church and reception and my parents and grandparents will be covering everything else, lol.

Post # 16
191 posts
Blushing bee

Let’s see… I have,

The Chapel picked out (NOT Booked) I just want us to be married there. Set and made a Budget sheet. I have made a rough timeline for the day of the wedding. I know who will be in the wedding party.I have my half of the guest list figured out. Our friend will do our engagement shoot, which will be the picture on the DIY STD’s. I know the hotel’s I will use to block off for our OOTG. how I will make the Out of Town bags (and everything that will be in them). I know who the DJ will be (NOT Booked). Program outline and how I want to setup our website.

I have narrowed down…

  • Wedding Dates ( We will pick together)


  • Ceremony Songs


  • Wedding Dresses


  • Bridal Party Attire


  • 2 color schemes (depends on date we choose)


  • Flowers


  • Reception Site (2 choices)

I have all of these things typed in a word document. then stored in my Wedding Plans folder on a zip drive. I also Pin A TON of things,mostly pictures of the dresses I like (for me/BM’s and FG’s).

Im crazy for doing/knowing all of this, since Im not engaged yet. But its so HARD not to think of my possible day. especially since Im currently helping my friend plan her wedding. we’re going to a Bridal Expo on the 5th, and I think Im more excited than her. 

My SO too says, “All Ill have to do is show up”. Pretty much, Lol. 

The topic ‘Waiting Bees – how much pre-engagement wedding prep have you done??’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors