(Closed) Waiting bees….when did you realize that you were a waiting bee?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
1077 posts
Bumble bee

What an interesting question! I wonder how different everyone’s answer will be.

I knew that I was officially waiting when we had been living together for a while and we had a conversation in which we set a firm timeline for when we want to be married by. Getting married went from an abstract concept to a very real thing, and I think that’s when I started to get excited about getting engaged. According to some people we’re pretty much engaged at this point, because we both have said to each other that we want to get married and we’ve worked out a timeline. Fiance has always dreamed about popping the question though, so for now we’re roomies/SOs. ๐Ÿ™‚

I know that some of the other bees on here think that waiting=impatience or obsession, but to me that isn’t what it is at all. It’s just a time period where he’s saving for a ring and we’re waiting for our lives to be in a better place for the next serious step. We’ve talked about it and it’s pretty much a done deal, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have off days where I wish I could hurry up and get there already! That’s why I love the bee, because I could never talk about that feeling IRL without it painting my SO in a bad light, which just isn’t fair to him.

Post # 4
Member
14424 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’m not waiting any more, but I can remember becoming a waiting bee.  We had not seriously discussed marriage, but alluded to it.  We sort of danced around the topic by discussing the future with “lets” do this or that.  Then a coworker got engaged (with a very sizable ring) and I remember feeling like, hey wait, I think I want to really be engaged and telling my bf “that’s a good size!” as she showed us her ring.  I knew I was definitely waiting cause I started day dreaming perfect proposals he could do too.. And when a twinge of jealousy ran through me when some else we knew would get engaged.

Post # 5
Member
302 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I realized I was a waiting bee when the Fiance started talking about kids.

What their names would be, how he hopes they like all the geeky stuff we do so we can share that as a family etc.

 

At one point I said to him: I just want you to know that I love you but you have been talking about kids but haven’t mentioned getting married. I was born out of wedlock and your parents got married only because your mom was pregnant. I don’t want to have a child out of wedlock or be pregnant when I get married.

He laughed and said that our being married was a given.

 

7 months later he proposed.

Post # 6
Member
1348 posts
Bumble bee

When I had already had “future talks” with my SO and got anxious everytime he had a surprise planned. Now I am sort of in a limbo as I know I am not ready yet- want to at least get into uni, and we both are not financially ready.

Post # 7
Member
823 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I considered myself “waiting” after we had talked about engagement and started to look at rings online and in the store. That was back in the fall and coincidentally, also when I joined Wedding Bee and started posting here with the other waiting bees. ๐Ÿ™‚ 

Post # 8
Member
1086 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I like the question, I’d never really thought about it before. In my case I didn’t know until I found the site really. My SO brought up marriage Valentines day in 2010. He asked if he proposed what I would say and I told him yes. It’s been many talks later but no official proposal yet. So a year later, out of mostly boredom and looking for a new hobby, I find all of these do it yourself things. They start me thinking about our wedding eventually and what we would both like. Gears started turning and I started making mental plans for the day lol. So I googled something wedding related found weddingbee and haven’t really been able to move on from it, it’s really a wonderful site! The wedding ideas kind of popped up out of no where a few weeks before Valentines day and every surprise, everything he says about the future I’ve been reading into it hoping it’s coming soon… Within the year I’m thinking… Hoping ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 9
Member
1611 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I was never really a waiting bee, but I think I considered myself waiting when we started going ring shopping.  We picked out the ring together, so when we started shopping, I knew it was going to happen, but I didn’t know when.

Post # 10
Member
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I decided I was officially waiting when we had talked about marriage and I knew my Fiance was looking at jewelry, and I had a pretty good hunch about when he’d propose. I don’t think I was ever waiting in the sense that I was worried about it happening at all, though — my Fiance isn’t exactly sneaky.

Post # 11
Member
802 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I’d been waiting since a few months after we offically got together. We had been best friends for 4 years before we started dating. I think he actually got jealous when other people got engaged, and me watching Say Yes to The Dress everyday probably gave him a few hints haha! He talked about kids and buying houses, and i’m like “wooaah nelly, gotta put a ring on it first!”and he did !

Post # 12
Member
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I realized that I was a waiting bee when my sister told me.  She told me that the beau is planning to buy a ring around Thanksgiving.  It has been about 3 months since then and still no ring! 

Post # 13
Member
580 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

For me it was on our 3rd anniversary. I had kinda expected it then, talked to him about it, and found out he saw marriage as way off in the future, that he knew he wanted to spend his life with me but that he really hadn’t thought about it yet. So I’ve been waiting officially for 9 and a half months.

Post # 14
Member
104 posts
Blushing bee

When we decided to move in together I knew I’d just be waiting. I told him I wasn’t going to live with anyone unless marriage was in the future.  Now we’ve lived together over a year and I’m still waiting. lol

Post # 15
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I guess it’s kinda complicated for me. The first time SO ever mentioned marriage, we were only dating for a few months, and he said “I can see us getting married in a year.” At that point, I really truly thought he would propose within a year. That didn’t happen, but I don’t remember feeling really disappointed or anything. I did continue to feel excited at the thought of getting married, and we’d joke here and there about going down to the courthouse. However, I started noticing him being more serious about it about last summer (after our 2 year anni) when he’d say things like “We’re in this for good” or “We are going to get married” as if it was a fact. I have to say, though, that I really really started to feel like I’m waiting since around December when he mentioned to me casually that he had started looking at rings on his own.  He had NEVER said anything like that before. I’m almost sure he hasn’t actually bought a ring, but now at least I have reason to “hope” for it, right. ๐Ÿ™‚ 

 

Post # 16
Member
2999 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

When we moved in and started talking about kids, moving to a new city, saving for a house….

now if he’d just get on with it! argh

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