(Closed) Waiting chat?

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 287
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

View original reply
@MaidMarian:  Hello, another UK girl here ;D

Post # 288
Member
1459 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo

View original reply
@PenguinLove:  Yay! I shall have to start a collection :3 In the UK thread you said you had moved to London, yes? ^^

 

 

View original reply
@pomellina:  I would tell you to get on the waiting list! It can make waiting seem a little more fun/bearable cause now you have a target to see how far down you can go :3 Maybe I’m just a wierdo with a competitive streak and a thing for lists but I’m sure I’ve seen other girls say it as well <3

Post # 289
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

View original reply
@MaidMarian:  yup, nearly 4 years ago now. 

Post # 290
Member
595 posts
Busy bee

I am 23, SO is 25. We’ve been together 6 years. We have yet to live together. SO plans on buying a house this year and says we will get engaged/married AFTER we live together. My problem is: How long after we live together? I asked him “Months? Years?” He says “Obviously I didn’t mean years after.” So then why not give me a solid time line? I have been nagging him about it to the point where we got into a seriously heated argument about it and how I keep “asking him the same thing” and he keeps “repeating himself.” Meanwhile, he doesn’t give me a solid timeline even though he THINKS he is! I want to know if it’s 3 months after, 6 months after? What!?!?!? When? 6 Years is long enough, it will be 7 years by January 2014 and I don’t see myself engaged at by then at this rate. It makes me so depressed.

 

Any advice?

 

Post # 291
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

View original reply
@Soon2BMrsC21:  Yes. I get to that point often. The problem is, even though I don’t want to talk about it (because I already did a few times), it is written all over my face. I don’t know how to hide it. I just can’t. I’m a very lively person, and lately, I’m just too quiet. So he knows damn well what is going on, and just looks at me with pity. That doesn’t help! So yes, I know what you mean.

 

Post # 292
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Hello friends bees! I’m so glad I found this board! On days like today, when I got my hopes up again only to have them crushed, coming here is what keeps sane. I had no idea that other girls felt like that, but reading all the stories, I’m relieved to see that my situation is very common and my reaction very normal. It helps so much! Funny thing, as I rushed on my computer to write before I went crazy (we were back from a special date that he had surprised me with, told me he had reservations in a fancy restaurant and to dress nice, and when we got there the waitress said she had a lovely table in a secluded corner for us… you know, all the right coincidences to make me think “could it be, at last???” and of course, the whole date, which was lovely and thoughtful, was to make me feel better because I had a rough week and was a lot quieter than my normal self. Needless to say, I had a rough week because I’m crushed, I can’t wait anymore and I am trying sooo hard not to talk about it), so anyway, of course, he came and sat right next to me to try to cheer me up lol I had to close the tab very quickly, because I don’t want him to have access to my venting and feel better place. He knows exactly why I am quiet and feeling depressed, as we talked about it a few times already. The thing that kills me, is that now he looks at me with a lot of pity (i think) and sighs. He did say he would marry me and he said he wants to spend his life with me, and he even talks about our wedding sometimes, but of course, he doesn’t want to make it official. So I wait. Oh I’m 37, so it hard… (he’s only 28). But since he is the only guy I ever wanted to marry, I guess I’ll wait, even if it means I will have to have kids before getting married, maybe before getting engaged! SO frustrating!

Post # 293
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Oups I forgot to mention we have been together 2 years and 4 months and lived together for 10 months now

Post # 294
Member
3 posts
Wannabee

Hello everyone…gosh I don’t even know where to start. First off all, it is so nice to find a website where people actually understand what I am going through! Knowing that my head is not actually going to explode at any given moment is a good feeling. So here is my story: I’m 30 (31 next month) and my SO is 33 (34 in June), and we have been together since Nov 12, 2009 (so near enough 3.5 years) and we have lived together since Dec 2010. We know that we want to spend the rest of our lives together, and have had discussions about marriage in the past but with no real resolution as to whether we will EVER get married! He does not feel like it’s essential, but I feel like before having children I would like him to make that commitment to me. He countered that by saying that he does not want to get married until he is “successful” but what the heck does that mean? I think he is doing great, we are doing great. We are happy without loads of money, whatever happened to in rich or in poor? Anyway, I tried once to get him to look at engagement rings and he was having none of it, and now I feel guilty if I even glance at a jewelry counter. I love him so much, but about 6 months ago I did have a moment where I really worried that neither one of us will ever change our minds and that this is where we are stuck…neither one of us able to move on because we don’t want the same things, but I could never imagine leaving him. He is happy to have children before getting married, but I hate that idea. It’s not the way I was raised, it works for other people and I have no problem with it morally but it’s just not for me. 

I feel better already…thanks bees

Post # 295
Member
72 posts
Worker bee

hello there! I’m new here, but I was reading some of the posts before. I’m glad there is a place to vent and meet people with the same situation.

My story with SO is quite long, the most important thing right now is that FINALLY he is on board with getting married. Just that I have to wait till he asks my dad and it’s several months away. But knowing my SO talking a lot instead of doing, I am still little worried when we can finally move to the next step of our relationship. I try to focus on being great couple… but there are other distractions from his family, that make me quite miserable: his brother’s wife has a baby and that makes my future Mother-In-Law distant from me, liking her so much, that I don’t even want to try to have a good relationship! Also, SO’s other brother has a girlfirend and I wasnt us to be engaged BEFORE them… we are much older… Ehhh I don’t want to get all upset and whiny, but it sucks not being the official wife and treated like a part of the family, when there are events and I am constantly reminded that it is not official by Mother-In-Law. MY SO is so relaxed and seems to overlook how this affects me.

I try to work on my self esteem, but because we are not being married yet, I always feel down when interacting with SO’s family (because of his brother’s wife!).

SO UNFAIR!!!!! I’m sure I’ll get over it once we’re married with kids…

Post # 296
Member
2490 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

Hi ladies, it’s givemecouture… I got a new account after some weird comments were made towards me so I decided to start fresh. Just wanted to let you know!

I’m not sure where we’re at with our whole situation. His parents were here last week and his mom kept making little comments about weddings and getting married and she kept talking about rings that she has sold lately. At one point she said something about a customer saying her rings are overpriced and my boyfriend looked up and her and said, “that’s because they are”.

I don’t know, I’m feeling very discouraged again. For some reason I really thought this past weekend was it. He made plans for us for Friday night and kept saying how he wanted to do something special on Saturday night.. well, we ended up having dinner at home and that was it. I just really thought it was coming! And today of course now I feel depressed because it’s Monday and yet another week has passed us by.

He first talked to his mom about a ring for me on April 3rd, so almost 3 full weeks ago! When my brother bought a ring from her he got it within a couple of days. So either he didn’t go through with it and buy it or he has it and for some reason isn’t giving it to me. I don’t want or expect a fancy proposal and he knows that, hell I don’t even want him to get down on one knee! I just want to know that we’re headed in the right direction. I really don’t want to walk again but I feel like I’m being played yet again. I really thought we were doing well, I really had hope and it’s like we’ve plateaued again.

I also don’t know if this is all in my head though… what if he did buy the ring then and now he’s waiting for it to get sized, or he has proposal plans and we just didn’t get to that yet.

It’s hard. We can’t get married next year and December is out for this year so we’re getting cut it close to get married in 2013. I would really not be happy with waiting until 2015… I’ll be 31 by then and I want kids.

 

Post # 297
Member
2490 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

I feel like I’m going to lose my mind!!

 

My boyfriend was acting SO weird last night! He wouldn’t stop hugging me and kissing me and telling me how much he loves me and he had this HUGE grin on his face all night. I kept asking him what he’s smiling about and he would just shrug and smile and say nothing. He went to play poker last night and he kept texting me things like “have I told you how much I love you today” and “do you have any idea how beautiful you are” all night!

 

It has to be happening soon right?! If it doesn’t I think I will snap.

Post # 298
Member
624 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

View original reply
@orchidaloha:  Hey lady! I’ve been completely MIA, but I just wanted to stop in and give you a virtual hug. I tried to keep up on everything while I was taking my break, but it’s been hard! BUT the one person I checked on was you!! From everything I have read, I truly don’t think your SO is playing with you or anything. And from the sounds of it, if he hadn’t bought the ring, his mom would know and wouldn’t want to sit there and talk about weddings and getting married!

 

This is just from my personal experience… But I kind of accidently found out that my Fiance had a ring… And one night, he was acting a lot like your guy. Was very strange for him… That was a Monday and he proposed on that Friday. Turns out he had the ring in his pocket and was going to do it… Until he realized he didn’t want to do it in his work uniform.

 

Anyways, it sounds like your SO is going to do it. And do it soon. I know what you are feeling right now and it sucks. I don’t think you will have to wait much longer though. I think that he knows he can’t lose you again and has got a plan all set up. I know signs like that aren’t universal, but I think if a guy has exhibited no signs and then all of a sudden something like that happens… it’s coming!! I’ve got my fingers crossed for you as always. Good luck girlie! I can’t wait to see that sparkler that will soon be on your finger

Post # 299
Member
2490 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

View original reply
@EmilyJoy:  Ooh I really hope so!!! We have talked a lot lately about potential wedding plans and we’re so close so actually being able to book something because we have came up with a pretty good plan. All I need is that ring on my finger!

I feel SO anxious!! I’m so ready to just be married to him and be able to move on with our life together and I feel like we’re SO close. But if we’re not I really can’t deal with this much longer. We have been through way too much.

I want to ask him but I don’t want to ruin anything, but I don’t want to get my hopes up. It’s a horrible, evil cycle!

ETA: His mom kept making comments about how it would be nice to go to a Hawaii wedding and how she needs another vacation there…. that’s where I want to get married but my SO is the only person I’ve told that to (other than bees lol). And at one point she asked me what kind of wedding dress style I like.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Post # 300
Member
2129 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

View original reply
@orchidaloha:  Hey there-I was wondering when you were going to update! I have to get use to your new SN, that’s a shame about the comments your were getting. I hope your SO proposes soon I’m on pins and needles for you!! lol 

Post # 301
Member
624 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

View original reply
@orchidaloha:  It sounds like it is coming to me!!! Especially since his mom is kind of in the loop, and making all this wedding talk!!! I really know how you feel, don’t ask him though. I swear to you, I was ready to ask my guy what the hold up was… And then it happened!! I know it sucks to hear “it’s coming” but it really sounds like it is!!! He should know better than to put you through that unhappiness and that pain again! I have faith it will be SOON!!

The topic ‘Waiting chat?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors