(Closed) Waiting for 3 years so I left him today

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
1860 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

No words. Just very sorry you are going through this.  It must hurt so much. Hang in there!! And good for you for standing up for yourself!

Post # 5
3108 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Even if he does turn up with a ring, I wouldn’t marry this man. He clearly hasn’t made you a priority in his life and you can do so much better.

Post # 6
218 posts
Helper bee

You did the right thing! He’s not in the space to be committed to you right now and you need to do the best thing for you.

Post # 8
1906 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

good on u for standing up for yourself. this will be a “when you love something let it go. if it comes back to you its yours forever. if it doesnt it was never yours to begin with.” maybe this will be the kick up the butt he needed to ask you to marry him and to actually do what hes been promising. and maybe not. and if not, you will meet someone who deserves you and sweeps you off your feet and is the right one for you!

good luck xx

Post # 9
80 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I question what is so wrong with Me? I compare myself to his exes who he lived with straightaway. He’s told me of the holidays they’ve been on. His ex didn’t lift a finger and lived rent free. She didn’t even get up to take her son to school, he did it even though he’s not his son. She didn’t decorate his house

This should NOT make you wonder what’s wrong with you… this is what’s wrong with him. And probably why he’s scared to move you in. Because when the exes lived with him, they did nothing to help and he was probably scared it’ll happen again. But I agree, 3 years and no sign of commiting? I think you did the right thing to pull the plug. He should’ve at least made baby steps.

Post # 10
3479 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

I think you did the right thing and I wish more women would listen to their gut and leave men who do not deserve them. Sounds like he never made much of an effort for you. You wanted to get your life moving in a positive direction and you did it. Good for yoU!

Post # 11
263 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Tigerlily1973:  Frown this is never easy. best wishes to you in the future and big hugs xoxo

Post # 12
360 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Tigerlily1973:  You are brave and you did the right thing. And you’ve got a great life straight ahead of you — whether he turns it totally around or you find someone else.

I was in a situation somewhat like this when I was 31, but it was a shorter relationship. I went through a few periods of thinking I was going to get that ring, getting excited, and then having my little dream snatched away from me time and time again. The amount of emotionally wrenching stress your and my old situation brings can indeed lead to breakdowns.

I learned that a man’s actions will always reflect his intentions. I learned that this man in the end didn’t want to marry me because he simply didn’t produce that ring.

I am now getting married for the first time at 37 to someone who did want me. I thought it would never happen for me because I met a string of frogs.

It will happen for you, whatever man it is with!

Post # 13
32 posts

I think you did the right thing and wish you the best of luck. Stay strong!

Post # 14
1357 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Im sorry hugs i know its tough but you did the best thing for you.

Post # 15
757 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I think you have absolutely done the right thing! You deserve all the happiness in the world, and you are so brave for recognizing that he was holding you back from that. I promise, the right man will find you at the right time and you’ll be able to have the family you want. Stay positive, it will happen!

Post # 16
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

You did the right thing!  Hugs to you!

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