(Closed) Waiting for a conversation?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: Should I bring up the possibility of our marriage for the first time?
    Yes, immediately. : (10 votes)
    26 %
    No, not for a while. : (2 votes)
    5 %
    Yes, soon but no rush. : (26 votes)
    68 %
    No, but start thinking about it. : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2815 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I think that it’s only fair to sit down and have a little conversation about timelines. Ask him if marriage is something he wants, approximately when he’s thinking? Are there other goals he wants to accomplish first? Just tell him you’re curious as to what his future plans are and that you want to make sure you’re both on the same page in terms of the future. No need to ask for specifics, just start by pinning down a general idea of what he’s thinking!

    Good luck! I know that before we got engaged (we were together 6 years) the “not knowing” drove me bonkers too! I had to ask him what he was thinking, and he was really good about letting me know that he wanted to have his Red Seal, a work truck, and a secure job before getting engaged. Sure enough, he stuck to that promise 🙂

    Post # 4
    Member
    1013 posts
    Bumble bee

    I think we had our super serious conversation around 3 years.  But it had sort of been implied all along since we had been building a life together.  We had conversations which went sort of like this,

    “I dont think i feel comfortable buying a house with someone when we arent sure of our future”

    “Well clearly Ms. Rush i want to marry you or i wouldnt be putting a foundation like this down in our relationship”

    “oh ok”.

    So i sort of took that at face value, but around 3 years we really discussed moving forward with marriage.  So definitely have that conversation in a non confrontational manner. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    1416 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @Kat_Kit2000:   I think you both are old enough and have been together long enough to have an adult conversation about it. Don’t rush it but just make sure he knows where you want to be with him in a couple of years from now.

        We really never had the full blown convo..it was more bits and pieces here and there. But it worked for us!

    Post # 9
    Member
    10366 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Having the “are we on the same page” conversation is a really important and adult thing to do. You guys are still pretty young, so don’t be surprised if he wants to hold off for a couple of years, but I think it’s totally reasonable to bat around where you see your futures going and whether that’s on the same path together. Doesn’t have to be a super “heavy” convo, but upfront communication is key to relationships, so you should def do it!

    Post # 12
    Member
    646 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    hey, it’s nice to hear that the talk went well and you feel relieved now. spend your waiting happily! 🙂

    The topic ‘Waiting for a conversation?’ is closed to new replies.

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