Waiting for the proposal

posted 9 months ago in Engagement
Post # 2
Member
994 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2022

You absolutely have the right idea! Do not move in before committing. In this forum thats an infamous tell tale sign that they will likely buy more time, even years because you’re trapped with comfortability. Definitely stand your ground with this. Have you been vocal about the move in concern? Hope so! If not tell him asap!

Post # 3
Member
1968 posts
Buzzing bee

Do not move in with him until you’re engaged. You’re not comfortable with it so you absolutely shouldn’t do it.

Tell him in no uncertain terms that you’re not moving in first. Don’t leave your future up to him to decide, especially when he claims he hasn’t thought about it much when you asked to discuss moving in- lay down your boundary and stick to it. 

You will feel much more secure knowing your living situation now instead of stressing about it and waiting around and wondering. 

 

Post # 6
Member
994 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2022

You’re welcome. Tell him marriage is about compromising! Thats unfair that hes not considering your wants. When you guys first started talking about next steps did he always say he wouldnt get engaged without moving in? if so then Understandable if he was upfront from beginning.

defintely the next talk is needed. He said he missed the opportunity to soeak with his dad about it, whats the procrastination with him not talking with your  parents yet then? 
this talk can be your fuel. Your can express in front of your parents about why its important for you to not move in until he is committed to you. Then see what he has to say in front of them. 

Post # 8
Member
1024 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

He’s moving the goalpost and that’s not fair.  He’s allowed to change his mind but that doesn’t seem to be what he’s doing, unless y’all are really bad at communicating.

I wouldn’t move in without a ring and a date either because he’s already broken promises.  Tell him you can have a longer engagement but without a planned date yo get married you see no reason to trust him not to move the goalpost again.  It’s his turn to prove himself to you. 

Post # 9
Member
2792 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
@mmarie2533:  My husband and I did not move in together before marriage, and were happy as can be. It’s not a prerequisite for marriage or engagement to live together. Stand your ground. I also don’t see why either of you needs to talk to your parents about this? You’re an adult, about to graduate college. If you decide to move out of your parents house, you just tell them. You don’t have your boyfriend sit down with them. 

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