(Closed) Waiting survey

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: What is the most challenging part of "waiting"?
    I hate to wait on anything : (9 votes)
    14 %
    I feel like I have no control over my own life and someone else is deciding the timing of it : (35 votes)
    54 %
    Waiting is ok but I feel like I'm left in the dark about my own life : (15 votes)
    23 %
    I don't find it challenging at all, I'm happy to let someone else decide my future : (6 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 3
    1220 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    @beeeforeigocrazy:  I voted for option 2, but only because we’ve been ring shopping and I guess it could be any day now. We have a date coming up on May 31, but I don’t have any expectations. The hardest part for me right now is keeping my mouth shut and not demanding to know when it’s going to happen. I’ve been told that I’m a bit of a control freak, but hey, it’s my life and I have a right to know that my time and energy isn’t being wasted on someone who’s not serious. I am trying hard to be patient and not start asking questions again. Since we’ve been ring shopping, I’ve been quiet (in the SIUP pact) since the beginning of April. However, he’s been making such a big deal about 5/31 (made me request the day off from work for this date) that if there is no proposal on that day, I may have to say something. We’ll see though.

    Post # 5
    70 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    I think that the hardest part about waiting is knowing that your ready and that your SO is ready but that the ball is in his court.  For example, my SO and I talk about marriage and engagement frequently.  We have said we want about 1 year engagement and we would like to be married in about 2 years.  However, that means a proposal could be anytime between now and this time next year!

    Post # 6
    363 posts
    Helper bee

    @beeeforeigocrazy: I definitely hate the feeling of lack of control and the way we are kind of encouraged to “shut it up” about it (On here and by the manchildren themselves haha). Umm why should I be quiet and submissive about the things that matter to me? Not gonna happen bahaha ;]. The men gotta grow up and learn how to face adult conversation about the subject! If they don’t want to deal with us hating the wait, maybe they should have thought of that BEFORE they made us wait! We have a date for when we wanna get married and I wanted to be engaged by 2 months ago lol…still waitin’ and probably will be for a while longer.  

     I hope yours and @purpledaisies:  waits end soon :).

    Post # 8
    2490 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2018

    I don’t like that I have absolutely no control over something so huge in my life.

    Post # 9
    1350 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2017

    I just hate feeling like I can’t plan my life.  In my head, I see us together, but it’s hard to really feel that and know it until we are engaged/married.  Then it’s clear we are both on the same page, both ready for life together, etc.  So waiting is really hard because you really are in the dark.

    Post # 10
    4524 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Lack of control for sure! I’m ready, he is too, but the situation is not ideal

    Post # 11
    446 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I’m the kind of person who likes to have a plan and move forward, so I hate waiting in any circumstance.  Would love to have the ring so I can start planning 🙂

    Post # 12
    1459 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo

    Aww man, when I decide I want something I start taking steps towards achieving it, or at least planning how it could be made possible… Yet now it’s like “okay I know I want to marry this guy… What now”, talking about it as much as i’d honestly like could be interpreted as pressure, I dunno it’s just annoying XD

    Post # 13
    1540 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I hate the lack of control. I’m a very planned out person, and I like schedules! My SO is a go with the flow, what’s the rush kind of guy, and he’s always late! I feel like he is just cruising about this engagement stuff. he knows that I get really frustrated about waiting and wants to make me happy, but his definition of “soon” is way different than mine!


    I know we’re going to get married, so I don’t have to worry about that part, but now I’m just like “DO IT ALREADY”


    I told him it’s frustrating because we’re in a mutual, equal partnership, so it’s very frustrating to have him make this big decision on his own. He does want a traditional proposal though. He says he wants to show me how much he loves me!


    Post # 14
    366 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @Marry Jane:  You might want to read my thread about how I feel like a circus animal balancing a cookie on my nose, not allowed to bark or try to eat it, and if I do that long enough, I’ll get the cookie! lol I explained it to my SO, and after a fight and a looong discussion the next day, he completely agreed that it didn’t make sense and we picked a proposal date together and he gets to propose in a special and secret way that day 🙂 So he gets his proposal, but I know when it is and we are both in on this huge decision! 

    Post # 15
    1220 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2015


    @Marry Jane:  

    thanks I hope the wait ends soon for everyone! I just hate trying to be patient and let him do this his way. I get that doing something special is important to him, but yeah..the thrill is gone once you’re in the impatiently waiting phase like I am.  especially since we looked at rings, and all he said was wow…that’s a lotta money. Sooo, I’m feeling a little distressed because idk what’s happening..did he buy a ring? Didn’t he? Who knows! I greatly dislike not knowing what’s going on and not having a plan. I think that’s the worst part..

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