Post # 1
So, I’ll be honest. I have unresolved issues with MYSELF things I want to get done before I jump the broom. I love my Fiance. But he has these things too.. yet, he still wants to get married this year. I want to get married, I’d rather wait till Dec 2012. Yes, that is a long time. But we’re young. I’d be 30 by that time and he’d be 32. I see no problem. Only problem I see is I can’t get on his state insurance which is fine. He says he has an internal “clock” and he wants to get married sooner rather than later and we could wait on the baby. Like I said before, that’s all fine. I want to wait…. What do y’all think?
Post # 3
sorry…which year did you mean to put?? your post says 2010
Post # 4
@Mrs. Meowerson: Fixed, my wedding is this year.. no idea why it never updated :/
I don’t know why I wrote dec 2010 or 11 on the post.. I meant 12′.
Post # 5
well, Mr. Meowerson wants to get married sooner, but I want to lose a substantial amount of weight first, as I am quite overweight atm. so i have my own unresolved issues with myself!
Post # 6
Is the weight the only issue? How much weight do you want to lose?
Post # 7
I totally get where your coming from. There were definitely several issues that I need to get in line before I started to get over my commitment issues (which had nothing to do with him). I say compromise. I would never have moved forward with a rushed wedding date only because I know I would ultimately feel some kind of resentment. I adore my FH but somethings love can’t fix and I’m happy that I had the presence of mind to stand strong in my conviction but still acknowledge his needs as well.
Post # 8
I think that [personally] issues should mostly be resolved before making a commitment if they are something that can be resolved/ hinge on being resolved prior to a commitment — to be of a healthier mindset would be overall beneficial to the union [imo].
However, that being said, I think it [conflict resolution, goals, issues etc] should be discussed at length with ones partner and a healthy compromise met that pleases both sides. Whether that be a counselling, a healthier mindset, certain goals being met [i.e.: school etc], really depends on the individual situation.
My partner & I agreed that we wouldn’t get married until at least one of us was finished or degree, started a career & that we had purchased a home [rather than throw our rent out the window], so we had certain goals that we felt needed to be met before we seriously started planning for a wedding– marriage we knew was an eventual given, the wedding is just the celebration 🙂
Post # 9
If the situation was reversed I would say the same thing. Relationships are about compromise. Since y’all both agree that y’all are for sure getting married, I think it makes the most sense to compromise and meet halfway on the date.