(Closed) Waiting to plan the wedding… lack of time and energy

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
755 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

you are so not alone.  My FH and I wanted to plan everything together.  I’m a teacher and he is in the military and is also an EMT, AND in school.  He is never around, and when he is- I’m usually tutoring, planning, or staying afterschool.  You guys will make it work, it’s just about making time for something new.  Try making a list of some some small, easy things you can manage in a few minutes. (something like starting a Pinterest board, or making a dress appointment).  I know busy schedules are always overwhelming, but try asking your FH if you guys can set aside an hour a week, or a half hour a week to solely speak about wedding planning.  That’s how we got started.  Once you know what you both want, the decisions are easier.  Good Luck! 

Post # 5
Member
739 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

You have plenty of time. We are 11 months into a 16 month engagement and honestly, all we did in the first 4-5 months of planning was book our venue (this also included the caterer and cake). We took a pretty huge break from planning because we had already booked a 10-day trip to Italy, and needed time to plan the Italy trip and simply enjoy our engagement. 

The rest of the planning took off after we got home from our trip, after the 1-year-til-the-wedding mark. 

I agree with PP, just take a little time out of your busy schedules to just sit down and dream about how you see your wedding day. The more you brainstorm and think of how you want it to be, the easier it will be to plan! 

Best of luck to you through this awesome time in your life! 

Post # 6
Member
367 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

There’s nothing wrong with being engaged for a little bit before you arrange the wedding. You’ll get there.

Post # 7
Member
8151 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

@CafeNurse429:  why don’t you wait until after the busy season to start planning.  i got engaged in february and we visited about 5 sites, all had dates in the october/november time frame where we were looking.

we are putting this wedding together in 8 months of planning.  honestly, i wouldn’t want to do this any longer than that.

i’ve talked to a few people who say you don’t need more than 6 months to put an event together.

the only issue is venue.  if you have your heart set on a certain venue during prime season, you might want to put a deposit down sooner than later.

first step: write a tentitave guest list and figure out a budget.

Post # 8
Member
3402 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@CafeNurse429:  I’m not in your exact situation, as I actually didn’t want to plan my wedding at all and neither did my FI. But I personally feel like if you have anymore than 7 months to plan, it’s just too much. By the time my wedding rolls around (wow, 50 days!) I will have only planned for it for 6 months, and probably only 4 of those would be serious planning.

This depends of course on the level of detail you want to be at your wedding (mine is admittedly really minimalistic), but if you don’t plan to DIY everything under the sone (I personally haven’t DIYed one single thing for my 6k wedding) then it shouldn’t take long to plan for it IMO.

Post # 9
Member
92 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

We’ve been engaged for almost 6 months, and pretty much the only planning i have done was find my dress/veil/shoes, and start a pinterest board. we looked at venues already, but everything is so tight with money and I am so busy with work AND school, that neither of us have taken it seriously.

enjoy your engagement. you only get this period of engagement once. people will always be judegemental and try to tell you whats too long to plan or whats too long of an engagement, but its all about you two, not anyone else.

that being sad, try to ignore peoples snarky remarks when they say something about the laidback timeline, cause they WILL say something eventually.

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