- 7 years ago
i’m sorry but I might go against the crowd.
i’ve been with SO for almost 6 years now. Last year and earlier this year, I was in the same place as you. There was a point that I even had put applications for a new apartment because I was so set on leaving.
I’ve snapped at him, yelled at him, I’ve vented at my girlfriends about it, and I’ve pinned just about every pinterest pin there was to pin.
Then I broke down. I cried. Ugly cried, and I told him everything I was feeling, right down to every piece of animosity I felt towards him and how he kept blowing me off and saying I was being stupid for feeling the way I feel. And then I gave him a timeline. “I want to have kids by such and such age and I am not going to be an unmarried woman.” and then I told him that if he was not on board with me, that he should just let me go so I can find someone else to plan my future with.
once everything was on the table, out there in the open, and I knew he knew how I felt, I demanded to know how he felt, because it was only fair.
and then he spilled his guts.
And then we had an understanding.
it’s been 7 months since this all went down. My walk date actually passed the other day, but I have no intention of leaving. We’re currently waiting on the right ring at the right price, we’ve narrowed ourselves down to a few venues, we’ve picked out colors together, and he took me to his mothers house and made me pick out one of several qi paos(chinese wedding dress) to wear that day. She had apparently bought them for me because she didnt know which one I would like best and they were a good deal while she was in china.
I no longer see engagements and weddings on Facebook and get jealous or Angry. We don’t get in fights after attending weddings together anymore, and if I’m feeling blue, i know I can talk to him now.
a maybe you and your SO need to get it all out on the table too, and then you’ll know where you stand.