(Closed) Waiting waiting waiting….

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
890 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

I think you should try your hardest to wait until end of summer. I know how you feel, I just started to really feel like I was waiting and I hate it!  If you wait til end of summer, you are being fair but if nothing happens by then you should definitely have a serious conversation about it and find out what is holding him up.  Hang in there, summer will be over before you know it 🙂

Post # 3
512 posts
Busy bee

I think a lot of waiting bees can relate. I know I can. No way around it, waiting sucks, pretty much all the time. Mine come and goes in waves, after a serious ‘come to Jesus’ moment with my SO, it’s been more mild over all. Instead of just pessimistic constantly depressing lows, I’m mostly content now with moments of mild frustration or impatience.

Ride out the summer. There’s no easy way to put it out of your mind. People recommend hobbies, more work, more time with friends, volunteering,  which might make you  tired but if you’re like me you can still worry anxiously even when tired. XD It just takes a little bit of time and enough forcing yourself to find other things to look forward too and appreciate in your life. And minimizing your time on Facebook, lol. 

Post # 4
1029 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I think you should focus on your career right now, both for your own benefit and to show your BF your life isn’t on pause waiting for him and he can’t drag his feet forever.  It’s been 4 months since you’ve graduated- I don’t know about your field or your classmates, but I find that employment promotes employment, same things for unemployment (meaning, if you already have a job it’s easier to find another job.  And the longer you’re not working or working outside your field, the harder it is to find a quality job).  Whether or not you get engaged at the end of summer, finding a job in your field leads to huge personal growth and satisfaction.      

Post # 5
2221 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

I’d focus on finding a job. Are you still long distance? Look for a job in his area if you can. (I assume his location is set if he’s working a family business.) Start saving whatever you can for your wedding/house so you’re ready when it happens. 🙂

Waiting is tough, but I think i’d wait it out at least to summer, if not a year. Maybe have a discussion come fall if his “end of summer” doesn’t pan out. It’s tough because you don’t want to ruin any possible surprises but you also want to make sure you’re not waiting around for nothing. 

Post # 6
357 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

I second PP. Focusing on finding a job will help the summer go by and it’s a great way to build yourself up. 🙂 I’d definitely recommend a discussion once the ‘end of summer’ passes. 

Post # 7
2562 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
Hunnybeebear:  I am thinking if he wanted u ti finish school first, then changed it to finishing ur resume and it still hasnt happened it…my guess is he is going to say he wants to wait until you get a job. Otherwise why would he care if your resume was complete?

I agree with other PP focus on finding a job in your field and begin saving a little. It may help him realize how grounded you guys are and ready to start ur lives. 

Post # 8
1008 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I don’t like how he’s dictating his requirements to you. What the heck does a resume have to do with getting engaged? If it’s about making sure you two are financially stable before marriage then say that, but these arbitrary requirements are silly. If summer passes and he doesn’t propose, I would talk to him and re-evaluate if he really wants to marry you as you are now or if he is stalling.

Post # 9
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

your bf just doesn’t sound ready to be engaged or married yet. 

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leisha606 and 
View original reply
spiffanee make really good points. 

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