Post # 1
We are planning to have a very small wedding on March 10th if this year. It is going to be in our backyard and very small. I am so tired of my family. We are literally on inviting about 15 people and my family is causing so much drama since I told them last year! My brothers don’t know if they can make it, my dad was frustrated because he was planning a vacation at the time, my mom is constantly telling me how no one is going to make it. Finally today, after probably the 100th time that she told me no one is going to make it to my wedding, I snapped. She then got angry and told me she doesn’t want to be there either and that she won’t tell me anything else anymore. I explained to her that it was just hurtful and every time she tells me it hurts me and I know that everyone can’t make it but I just don’t want to hear it all the time. So she got offended by me getting hurt by her words. I am so tired of this! I can’t even imagine how it would be if we were having a huge wedding! I’m at the point where I just want to get married in Vegas with him (our honeymoon is there anyway). I’m done with it. His family isn’t causing any drama they are very happy we are getting married! I don’t know why my family is not happy. We have been together for 7 year and he’s an amazing guy! My mom hates people in love and hates men in general because my father cheated on her. Just because it happened to her doesn’t mean it will happen to me. I am so tired of this already I just want to tell everyone don’t bother. I just want to marry him anyway not everyone else! What should I do? Has anyone else experienced this? Thank you in advance.
Post # 2
I haven’t experienced this myself but I would elope for sure. The stress would be completely off and there’s no chance someone’s negativity would ruin your day, assuming you ignore the angry calls and texts when you tell them the wedding is cancelled. Honestly it sounds so relaxing by comparison that eloping in Vegas is probably worth it.
Post # 3
- Wedding: April 2019 - Huntsville, AL
I’m sorry this is happening to you, bee.
The way I see it, you can either 1) elope and have a wonderful time with your husband stressfree away from your family, or 2) have your backyard wedding with just his wonderful, supportive family and whoever does show up from yours. If your family is being flakey, forget them and move on, and focus on your husband’s family and friends who WILL be there for you, not acting like it’s an inconvience.
I have had some family members express similar thoughts. “No one will be there, it’s too far away, you chose a bad location”, etc. It bothered me for a few days but at the end of it all, the people who are willing to make the effort for us are coming, and that was enough for me.
Post # 4
- Wedding: Scotts ~ Walnut Creek
If guests have already made plans and accommodations to attend I think you should go through with the backyard wedding while focusing on those who are happy to be there and ignoring the stress bringers. But if your fiance would also like to elope and no one will be inconvenienced if you change the plan then that would be my choice. This isn’t a decision you should make without considering his feelings, its his day too.
Post # 5
I would elope with a nice simple, stress free package!
Post # 6
Ahh I’m sorry, bee. What exactly do you and your Fiance want in a wedding? We’re you truly wanting your families there or were you inviting them out of obligation? What if you changed it to a destination wedding where you invited both families to vegas and didn’t expect or “worry” about who could make it? I’m definitely not one to say just change things midway (destination especially) and I do think destinations are a bit inconsiderate, but if you’re ONLY inviting 15ppl and some clearly are for sure declining then maybe see what his family thinks? I would say consider helping your mom with accommodations, but she’s bringing down your happiness, which is never good. Of course you can always just elope and it would be stress free.
Post # 7
Hey Bee a few months ago I posted about how unhappy I was planning my wedding. I had similar feels for different reasons. I came to the conclusion that my wedding is about me and my fiancé and that’s all that matters. Have the wedding you want, where you want it. If your family can’t make it for whatever reasons so be it. If your mother is not supportive than don’t mention anything about the wedding to her. Celebrate with people who are happy for you and who will make the time for your special day.
Post # 8
Well I would be very ready to say ” just elope’ but for this “His family isn’t causing any drama they are very happy we are getting married!” It seems a shame they would be done out of of a happy event because your family are being so unpleasant .
So, I would go on with your nice little 15 person backyard wedding , but I would absolutely not enter into any more discussion with your rmum, or anyody else difficult about it . Shut down all and every negative comment with a ” well, we’ll miss you then ‘ or similar and change the subject firmly and completely. Every. Single. Time.
Post # 9
Have your backyard wedding like you originally wanted to. Your family needs to step up and make arrangments to be there especially if they agreed to the March date a year before. People will show up. Tell you mom you don’t care either way because you are happy to get married and who ever wants to share that happiness can be there. If she has her own issues about love tell her she can go see a therapist!