- 6 years ago
So on friday my SO tells me he wants us to get a house before we get married and we should be able to do that in 1 – 1 1/2 years…. ok.
On sunday he says we should try to take my kids to a cabin on the lake next summer cause we didn’t get to this summer… sounds like an awesome plan.
Last night…. he gets home late from taking my kids on an outing (i had to work) Is very silent, not “how was work”…. nothing. I asked why he was so silent, he then tells me we have a problem…actually a few !!!
He tells me he grately cares for me and my 2 kids, and that is why he has tried so hard to be what we need… but he does not want to live a lie forever. He doesn’t want to ever get married or have a baby, was just trying to make me happy. He loves me but the way you love a bestfriend… “want to see them happy, doing good in life”. Said he has felt this way for a few months but thought it was a cold feet kind of thing, but has realized it is real, the way he feels.
Says he still cares deeply, and will always be there for me and my girls… as a friend. We were planning our lives together just days before ???
Part of me want this to blow over, he goes back out to camp next week…and maybe some time alone will make him realize what he is throwing away.
Part of me does not want to be with someone that is unsure of being with me. But I love him so deeply !!! I never left the “honeymoon area”… not sure how he did. 🙁
I have some really tough choices to make in the next while… I just feel so lost, broken, and alone.
Thank you to anyone who got to the end of my emotional rant…. just needed to get this out… and I’m not ready to start telling family and friends.