(Closed) Was I in bad taste? (Wedding party question)

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 32
Member
2890 posts
Sugar bee

@SimplyEuphoric:  I am not that familiar with etiquette rules regarding bridal parties, but I would assume the bridal party is chosen by the bride, since they’re supposed to help around with the wedding planning. Most of the times, I guess brides naturally chooses people she loves and can trust. I would not ask for a random woman to be part of the bridal party, therefore I would assume it doesn’t matter if her hubby is one of the groomsmen, it doesn’t entitle her to be part of the bridal party. 

Post # 33
Member
1192 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

That would be very silly. One of my bridesmaids is a lesbian and I haven’t met her current girlfriend despite the fact that they’ve been dating for quite awhile and live together (we live far away from one another). Should I have asked her girlfriend to be one of my bridesmaids too because they’re in a serious relationship?

Post # 34
Hostess
3571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Nope, that’s not a “rule.” How silly to think that. Just let it roll off your shoulders and keep on keepin’ on! haha. 

Post # 35
Member
4192 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

Agree with everyone else, this woman is WAY off base. And their child doesn’t need to be in your wedding, either. I can just see it now- “No, I don’t want little Timmy to wear that, he has to wear THIS.” Keep her as far away from your planning as possible!

Post # 36
Member
1161 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

View original reply
@SimplyEuphoric:  Our bridal party consists of two of FI’s siblings, and our two best friends. The siblings are both married, my bestie engaged to be married 3 weeks after us, and our other best friend in a serious live-in relationship for multiple years with a girl I love.

We would have to double our bridal party if this was a rule, its ridiculous to even suggest such a thing.

Also, how RUDE of either of them to say things like that to you. RUDE RUDE RUDE people around these days!

Post # 37
Member
3194 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@SimplyEuphoric:  she has no idea what she’s talking about, and wants recognition…why? because her husband is a groomsmen? not only is that not a ‘rule’, that is stupid.

your bridesmaids should be the people you are closest to and who mean the most to you. the women you want to stand with you and support your marriage to your husband on your wedding day. ignore this person.

Post # 38
Member
5280 posts
Bee Keeper

This lady sounds wack. If anyone is out of line it is her. My husband has lots of friends who have sginificant others but I didnt have them in my bridal party..I had MY close friends not the wives of my husbands friends

Post # 39
Member
2479 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

View original reply
@weddingmaven:  I take your point because I hadn’t actually noted that the husband is, in fact, the friend of the OP, rather than a friend of her Fiance. I can certainly see the potential for awkwardness ahead. Unfortunately, none of it helped by this rather bizarre expectation of being in the bridal party.

Post # 40
Member
2959 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think everyone agrees that this woman need not be in the bridal party. My FH is having his father as his best man and his brothers as his GMs. Well I never even thought about asking my FSILs to be BMs. I don’t even like them. I would not make her son a ring bearer, three is more than enough!

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