(Closed) Was I wrong for getting upset?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
4439 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@figgnewton:  Is G a woman — is that the problem?

 

G shouldnt’ have text you about McDs, Darling Husband should have.

 

You are right, he’s clearly not helping with his share of taking care of you, your daughter and your home together. That should be his priority and he sounds a bit immature, which doesn’t suprise me at 21.

Post # 5
Member
4313 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@figgnewton:  Hell no you’re not in the wrong.  In my opinion, your Darling Husband is not working and should be picking up most of the slack — especially if you’re pregnant.  Why is he spending more time with G than you?  That’s ridiculous, and I would be pissed.

Post # 6
Member
3574 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

 You are not wrong.  Your Darling Husband should be seeing G once a week, not 3-5. He needs to get his priorities straight.

Post # 7
Member
4439 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@figgnewton:  I see, that guy sounds terrible!  Also, I very rarely put up with Darling Husband letting people spend the night if they’re not family members.  There’s just no reason, you have to wake up with your daughter and be a family!

Post # 8
Member
7312 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

He needs to grow the f up. He is a father and a husband. He has a child to taake care of, so he is no longer able to act like a child himself. There is absolutely no reason that he should not be home with his family all night, every night. Having a hang out night with friends once or twice a month = reasonable. 3-5 nights a week = beyond ridiculous.

Post # 9
Member
849 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

First of all, why is G staying over so often? Y’all are married with a daughter and one on the way. He should NOT be spending the night all the time, that is ridiculous. You need to kick him out.

 

Secondly, why are they spending so much time at the pool? Why can’t your husband watch the daughter so that you can come along? It’s weird that he tries to talk you into staying home all the time so that he and his buddy can go to the pool. 

 

And no, you are NOT wrong here. They are immature and behaving like a child. And your husband shouldn’t complain about asking “permission”. When you are married, of course you have to let them know where you’ll be, to an extent. He has responsibilities and he needs to step up to the plate and do them. 

 

Bottom line, DON’T let them make you feel guilty. You are not in the wrong, they are. 

 

Good luck, I hope your husband wises up and kicks G out and overall becomes a more responsible person. 

Post # 10
Member
7230 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@figgnewton:  Your husband was out of line. He shouldn’t have to “ask permission” because he should be making responsible decisions for you and your family. You shouldn’t have to have a daughter and two grown men acting like children. 

Post # 11
Member
1846 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

You’re not wrong at all. I’m sorry, but your Darling Husband needs to man up, get a job, and start taking more responsibility for his family. Why doesn’t he have a job? What is going to happen when you Hsve this new baby?

He also clearly needs to set some boundaries with G.. It’s not ok that he’s spending more time with him then with you and your Dirty Delete. 

 

Post # 12
Member
6826 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Sounds like typical late teens/early 20’s guy behavior. Sounds like your Darling Husband needs to grow up and grow up now….

Post # 13
Member
496 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

You are not wrong, your husband sounds extremely immature. He has to realise that once he chose marriage and kids that means he chose to start acting like an adult and putting them first. He should not be out partying with his friends over half the week leaving you to do all the work. It is also not your job to parent him on top of all your other responsilities. If he won’t listen to you, perhaps it is worth investing in some marriage counselling?

Post # 16
Member
849 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

@figgnewton:  That might be a risk you have to take. Do you want an extremely irresponsible husband and his friend constantly around? If you kick G out and if your husband goes with him, he might eventually wake up and realize that he lost a good thing. Of course, he might not wake up and realize that. I don’t know your husband so I can’t say.

 

But if your husband goes with G, then he’s not the kind of man you want anyway. That’s just my two cents. 

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