Was my coworker inappropriate?

posted 1 year ago in Career
Post # 2
Member
5851 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

You both sound like you’re 12.

Post # 3
Member
2855 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

paigelove :  I wouldn’t say this is inappropriate, like get HR involved inappropriate. It just sounds really immature, I’d ignore him. He was trying to get a rise out of you and he did. 

Post # 4
Member
999 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

paigelove :  disagree with PP, this is HR appropriate since he is showing no interest in respecting you or slowing down. Go to HR, nip this in bud and it will be a fully documented case. He’ll leave you alone after that.

Post # 5
Member
13753 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

rockclimberbride :  He might leave her alone, but she’ll have the reputation of someone who can’t take a joke and went to tell on him. 

It was a stupid, immature thing for him to do, but going to HR is a pretty big overreaction in this situation, IMO. 

Post # 6
Member
8944 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

paigelove :  I don’t think you’re overreacting. I would go to HR, if nothing else to clarify whether company policy allows people to take random unexpected photos and then post them on social media without the subject’s permission. It’s not unreasonable to expect to have some control over how your image is used in a professional setting.

Post # 7
Member
707 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - Iowa

I would definetly say its inapprpriate and very unprofessional. What kind of workplace is this? I think if you’ve asked him to drop it, and he doesn’t, then it could be taken to HR.

Post # 8
Member
5082 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2017

I’d do the same thing to him. 

Post # 9
Member
3074 posts
Sugar bee

 how is that even funny? Not much of a prankster.. 

I would probably ignore it, but if he wont drop it i would go to HR. I would also try to find out if it was actually posted to instagram and in that case, i would go immediately to HR.

Post # 10
Member
9033 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

paigelove :  I would find out if he posted it because it will only strengthen your case. The fact that he is continuing to make comments is not ok. There is taking a joke and then there is posting (or threatening to) a photo you never got permission to take and were asked to delete on a public platform to cause embarrassment and then repeatedly telling the person upset by this they overreacted and then cntinuing to bring it up. 

Document everything and consider going to your manager and/or HR.

Post # 11
Member
1865 posts
Buzzing bee

I think going to HR isn’t a bad idea If he isn’t stopping. I would say the next time he says anything to you joking about it, you look at him with a serious face and say, “ no. You are making me uncomfortable. Your behavior is inappropriate. Take my photo again and we are going to have an HR problem” he most likely will start laughing and staring at you. You hold your serious face and if he still laughs you say, “ what about what I just said was unclear to you? Do I need to go to Hr right now?” 

His dude is creepy, his jokes aren’t funny to you and he needs to stop. Be loud and clear and serious. If he doesn’t get it after you said that go right to Hr and tell them. Who cares if the office thinks. You can’t take a joke. I am one of those people who is a prankster and I can tell you that I know there are some people who don’t like it. So I respect that and leave them alone. No one thinks they are lame at all for not liking pranks. 

Post # 12
Member
31 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2020

he’s trying to get everybody’s attention by making you the subject of the conversation. if you’d ignore him and let him do everything he wanted without you getting annoyed, most probably his subject shifted to other people in the office

Post # 13
Member
204 posts
Helper bee

zzar45 :  I disagree. The coworker sounds 12 (or younger). Unless she left something out, the OP hasn’t done anything to deserve being called immature.

OP – What your coworker did was extremely unprofessional at the very least. If he has a history of doing this and getting away with it and/or not being called out on it, it sounds like this is also an example of poor office culture.

Post # 14
Member
1527 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

That’s…bizarre.  And wholly inappropriate for a workplace.  What in seven hells is that guy’s problem?  I think you’re well within reason to ask him to delete it and to react the way you did.  I would have been upset too.  It’s your place of work, not a gd Chuckie Cheese.

Post # 15
Member
321 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

hickoryhills :  unless she does work at Chuckie Cheese…

In which case, I’d still be as annoyed!  Employees should be able to attend their jobs without worrying about childish attacks like this.  He’s a bully and I’m guessing your other coworkers feel the same.  I’d try the “no reaction” tactic first, because that usually disarms children pretty effectively.  But I also wouldn’t blame you for going straight to your supervisor.  I wouldn’t care if that’s the “uncool” thing to do.  Sorry not sorry.

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