(Closed) Was not meaning to be mean:((

posted 6 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think your thread created a really good discussion on the bridal industry and photographers and photoshop.  Even if you didn’t mean to come across as being mean, it actually started a really good conversation.  Don’t be too hard on yourself – sometimes it can be easy to come across incorrectly via email.  

Post # 4
7609 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@cherryblossomlove:  Hey, don’t worry about it.  I didn’t comment on your thread because to be honest, similar threads have been started in the past and they’ve turned out just as badly.  I think a lot of the discussion/disagreements are based around wording and implied judgments.  Pretty much any time weight comes into play around here, a lot of judgments start happening and people get upset.

I didn’t think you were trying to hurt anyone’s feelings with your original post (though I didn’t read the whole thing).  I agree that the poses the models are asked to get into are sometimes pretty ridiculous!  Here is a funny thread that turned out ok:

What is up with the crazy model poses?!

and more recently, this hilarious one:

VENT: Seriously, STOP it…

Post # 5
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I saw that thread and didn’t even think of it as mean in anyway.  I can totally understand what your intent was.  I wouldn’t worry about it ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 6
2416 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I agree, I didn’t think it was mean!

Post # 7
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

It’s difficult enough to get intent, humor, and sarcasm across on the internet… then add in the fact that many people on here tend to ‘skim’ the OPs posts and then reply without having read the entire thing.  I’ve seen entirely benign posts on WB that got completely out of control as I read through the responses, and I start wondering “how in the WORLD did the original topic get turned into this???”  I read through your other topic and I understood your intent, but I never did get in on the conversation.  Don’t worry, it just happens on here… some days people are more feisty than others!

Post # 8
2759 posts
Sugar bee

I don’t believe you were trying to be mean, it’s just one of those things where you might want to step back before making a post and ask yourself if you might be unintentionally hurting someone. I think most of what set people off was the word “skeletor.” I’ve got a close friend who is REALLY skinny with a tiny body fat percentage, and she hears constantly from people about how she needs to eat a sandwich or wondering if she’s a boy – and it hurts her just as much as it would me, a plus-sized woman, to be called a “cow” and told to eat less.

Would you have posted a picture of a plus-size model and said “ew, what a whale!”? Prob not. So it’s just thinking about those little things ๐Ÿ™‚

I definitely agree that your post generated a lot of good conversation, so I wouldn’t sweat it. Just learn from the post to step back before hitting “submit” (which I have to remind myself to do a lot lol).

Post # 9
13015 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Agreed, I got your intention and think some people took it the wrong way.  I don’t think you were insulting or trying to offend thin women, but of course, things always get taken the wrong way and people can be very sensitive about their weight.  There will be new drama today, so don’t beat yourself up!

It’s very sweet of you to put up an apology, even if it’s unnecessary! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 10
4150 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Don’t worry about it!  I didn’t take it as you trying to bash the model, I took it more aimed at the ridiculous dress companies that think that posing the models in that way is the best way to sell their dresses…so seriously, no worries! ๐Ÿ™‚

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