(Closed) Was there any significant factor that put a hold on your proposal?

posted 8 years ago in Proposals
  • poll: Factor that postponed your proposal:
    Money. Funds were tight, we were paying off loans, combined income wasn't at desired level, etc... : (32 votes)
    29 %
    Home. Wanted to live together first, were in the process of buying a home, or it was a LD relationsh : (5 votes)
    5 %
    School. One or both of us were waiting to graduate or get accepted. : (28 votes)
    25 %
    Job. One or both of us was out of a job, or were waiting to get promoted. : (10 votes)
    9 %
    Age. One or both of us were too young. : (8 votes)
    7 %
    Scared. One or both of us have been divorced, hurt, or we just weren't ready to talk about it. : (5 votes)
    5 %
    Other. Explain... : (22 votes)
    20 %
  • Post # 3
    1982 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Age. We were high school sweethearts, so we wanted to put some time on our relationship before we got married. I don’t regret anything we did and honestly, if I HAD to, I could have waited longer. But I am excited to be getting married now, young or not!

    Post # 4
    1336 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    Mine told me that I had to finish grad school first.  And apparently my mom made it clear to him too that it would be much better if I finished first.  Funny thing was he didn’t propose until a year after I finished grad school, but that was also because we both had to relocate.  At my graduation party he made an announcement to thank everyone for coming and to congratulate me, and everyone thought he was going to propose!  But when he finally did it was great, we went on a trip to Hawaii and he completely surprised me.  It was all worth the wait!

    Post # 5
    2856 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    Our situation is unlike most other people our age. It all evolved around my Father-In-Law. My hubby took my Father-In-Law in nearly 5 years ago for health reasons but it doesn’t stop there. He dad is a mess, literally and figuratively and can make people go insane and I am not kidding about that. He is not really a clean person but also he has a past that is so hard to look past.

    This man can literally drive any normal woman away from my hubby. So my hubby needed to make sure that I was ready for it ALL. Because even though I would be marrying him, I had to be tough skinned to look past his father and see him for who he is and take comfort in knowing that he will NEVER be like his father. So when we weren’t getting engaged, I had thought it was all about the money but it was never that. We moved in together Sept of ’08 and got engaged Dec. ’08. His words were ” I was such a trooper” and he believed I was ready to take on this challenge.

    Post # 6
    2022 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Darling Husband was waiting to graduate medical school.  He proposed a few mos after he started working.

    Post # 7
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    We waited for me to graduate college (i was 22) AND he was deployed. And he wanted to use his tax-free paycheck to buy me a bigger ring by waiting until 8 months into said deployment. He literally said, “i can buy you a small one now, but if you wait until I get back, I’ll buy you whatever you want”. I said, “eh, i’ll wait 8 months but I’ll start planning now!” =]

    Post # 8
    745 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    He wanted to see if we could live together without killing each other.  He bought the ring when we moved into our house, but didn’t propose until 9 months later.

    Post # 9
    1556 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    We are waiting for annulments, so we can be married in the Catholic Church.  If it weren’t so important to us to be married in the Church, we would have been married already.  Sometimes, I am still temped to forget all about the Church wedding and just go get it done…but I know we’d both regret that later, so we are still waiting…

    EDIT:  I just realized I read the question wrong.  There was no delay in the proposal.  He proposed after a few months of dating.  We have a delay on the wedding date.  Oops!

    Post # 10
    2280 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    We would have been engaged last winter if it weren’t for money. I  think he was worried about distracting me from my final semester too.

    Post # 11
    536 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Well for us it was a combination of a few of the above.  We just bought a house together and we had bills to pay off because of that!  The first year of owning a house is said to be the toughest!…I think its more like the first two years are the toughest!!  Then within a year of buying our house we both lost our job(thankfully at differnt times!)  So we had a lot more bills to pay off then we had orginally planned on!  Bills are the worst!!!!!!!!!

    Post # 12
    2397 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    He was waiting until I was done with school.  He proposed right before my last semester.  When we get married, I will be graduated 🙂

    He also delayed the proposal by a few weeks because he was afraid I suspected it was coming (which I did!).

    Post # 13
    5263 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Money and age. We felt ready to get engaged right at 18, but didn’t want a 4 year engagement, and didn’t want to get married before we graduated from undergrad. Which is tied into the money part – being financially independent as a married couple is very important to us, and R’s parents still help him with finances. (He works for it, but he’s the best paid CNA there!) – no way could we afford even one year of the tuition on what we make right now, because we go to a private school, and though we both have scholarships and I have financial aid and loans, we’d still end up paying about $40,000 combined for a year. 

    Post # 14
    4385 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I guess it was sort of school, but not really so I put other. We both graduated last year but he’s working on getting his CPA (Chartered accountant). He wanted to wait until he was done with all of the tests, but ended up proposing sooner than that. We compromised by having a long engagement so we won’t actually have to stress about the wedding until he’s done the tests. So I guess maybe there really wasn’t anything that put it on hold… lol.

    Post # 15
    5670 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    We had talked about getting engaged and were going to wait until Fiance got his trade license which was supposed to be in 2008 so we figured we’d get engaged in 2009 so he would have a little time to save when he was making more money. But since he ended up getting his license in the end of 2007 we started looking at rings in 2008 and got engaged that summer.

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