(Closed) was this planned?

posted 6 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
1186 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Asking if it was planned is just plain rude. To the “is your husband excited” questions, I’d say “Oh, he doesn’t know yet”.

 

Post # 4
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

People ask weird stuffashen it’s about babies. People keep asking me if my new son “is a good baby” I want to reply “no he’s anahold” just to see what they would say.

Post # 5
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

We had a woman at work whose standard question regarding pregnancy was “was it planned?”.  She also made it widely known that her own kid was absolutely not planned and had ruined her life.

Post # 7
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

@AprilJo2011:  I feel sorry for that poor kid.

I find that people have no filter when it comes to babies or women being pregnant. Did you all know that heels are bad for pregnant women? I get told that on a daily basis by the same person at work b/c she asks me when I’m going to stop wearing my heels. When I tell her when I get uncomfortable wearing them, she informs me that they’re bad for pregnant women. Thanks for that tidbit…had no idea.

Post # 8
Member
575 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I feel like not telling everyone your trying is a double edged sword. We didn’t tell people because we didn’t want any pressure on it, but then I definitely felt as if people were wondering whether it was planned or not, which is annoying because we are over joyed and so excited. I have just decided people are idiots around pregnant women. 

Post # 9
Member
228 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Yeah, I’ve gotten that question before too and you just have to stop and wonder. It’s like, we’ve been together for 5 years and have avoided pregnancy this long, I think we know what we’re doing – haha. But it’s true, people really have no filter. I’m 21 weeks and I’m still getting comments that I don’t look pregnant, just look like I ate a pizza and drank some beer. Um – thanks?  

Post # 10
Member
3830 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

*holds up hand* i will fully admit Future Sister-In-Law told us she is expecting a few weeks ago, and i was super excited and the flood gates opened and i just couldn’t shut up with the questions.  It was purely excitement though. It came from a good place i swear!!! hahaha

Post # 11
Member
1318 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I just always ask, “Are you guys excited?” with a smile. However, I am younger and have had friends who got pregnant young and I have had several people say that they weren’t. So I always thought it was a good way not to gush if they aren’t happy and a good way to open it up if they are. 

I don’t know why people can be so bad at wording questions, but I’m sure they don’t mean to be rude. 

Post # 12
Member
2775 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I consider it none of my business whether somebody’s baby was planned, so would never ask.

Post # 13
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@Rose120:  Yeah, we were worried for that kid, too.  Especially when she brought it in one time 3 months after birth and asked my (childless) coworker if the milk she had warmed up for the kid was warm enough.  Shouldn’t you know this yourself after 3 months?! Other quotes include “Of course I didn’t bring the baby on vacation with me! That wouldn’t have been a vacation if she was there!” and my personal favorite, “I wish I could go to jail, then I wouldn’t have to take care of the baby”.  Luckily, she had a live-in nanny and the child looked fine whenever we saw her, so no apparent child abuse there, but come on!

I’m just waiting for someone to ask me that, actually, so I can reply “No, I slipped and fell on a d***.”

Post # 14
Member
515 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Clark Gardens

I’ve gotten that question a few times but it doesn’t really bother me, since we got pregnant so soon after the wedding, I think it is a valid thing people might be wondering.

Post # 15
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@Rose120:  I’ve been asked that, but by far the worst question has come from my Brother-In-Law.

“Is this a good thing?”

Yeah…because if it weren’t, we’d be telling everyone about it, cray-cray dude.

I understand doctors asking this question, but it really stings coming from family and/or friends.

Post # 16
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

That to me is just a weird question to ask of married people.  Because it doesn’t matter if it was planned or not most married couples plan to have a family one day.  And then I think it is just plain rude to ask people you really don’t know all that well.  It’s one thing to ask your sibling if you planned it because maybe you have discussed it in the past etc… but for a co-worker just weird and rude!

I get asked if I’m having twins.  I’m big in the belly but it’s round like a basketball your baby boy type belly.  I’m not big any where else and the belly isn’t all that big.  So I’m not sure where that question is coming from.

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