(Closed) Way too many invited!

posted 6 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I know there’s a certain percentage of Nos that come in, but with a venue restriction, personally, I would start cutting.

Post # 4
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@sandiegosarah:  I’d cut. I had a HUGE list, and some of those ‘never been to a wedding, didn’t even to go the one across the street’ are now traveling 2 hours for ours! Eep! I’d cut to a safer margin, and ask close family/friends and those you see to please send in their cards ASAP. 

Post # 5
Member
2815 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Cut +1s for people who aren’t in long term relationships, engaged or married.  See where that gets you and then work on random people.

Post # 9
Member
5475 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

We had to make some cuts.  We are still giving +1’s to anyone in a relationship (and we decided that we aren’t going to judge whether someone’s relationship is serious), +1’s to the wedding party, and +1’s to anyone who has to travel and won’t know many other people.  I did cut cousins I haven’t seen in years- just because our parents share some DNA doesn’t make you closer to me than my friends!  We are also not inviting many co-workers.  Our truly single friends who will know other people will not be getting +1’s, and we are also having a lunch reception to cut cost a little bit.  It’s tough, but it can be done 🙂

Post # 11
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@sandiegosarah:  Don’t do 2 rounds of invites.

– It is called b-listing and considered rude.  People will find out they did not receive the invites during the first round and will be offended that they were not a ‘first choice’ guest.

– If people RSVP no, their plans may still change and make them able to come after all.  What are you going to tell them?  Sorry, I gave your spot to someone else and you can’t come?

Make cuts in circles (cousins, second cousins, great aunts and uncles) for family.  Everyone in a relationship (who considers themselves in a relationship) must be allowed to bring their other half.  Apart from that, +1s are not necessary.

Post # 12
Member
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

You can invite people to the reception but not to the ceremony.

Post # 13
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Over the Moon:  Honestly, this isn’t a good idea either.  A reception is to thank people for witnessing your marriage ceremony.  Why host them if they weren’t allowed to see them get married?

Post # 14
Member
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@futuremrsfitz18:  A reception is a celebration of a marriage. If someone elopes does that mean it’s in poor taste for them to throw a reception when they get back? What about an anniversary party?

The reverse is bad etiquette–inviting people to the ceremony but not the reception–but the small ceremony/large reception thing is accepted by all the big etiquette gurus.

Post # 15
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Over the Moon:  That’s really only true for a truly private ceremony (immediate family only or elopement).

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