- 10 years ago
- Wedding: January 2012
I need to vent a bit, and also ask for a bit of advice…
First of all, my Future Mother-In-Law is a very good person. She is kind and supportive. She loves me and I love her.
I know how incredibly lucky I am to have her as a Future Mother-In-Law. I have seen others go through HELL with their MILs and it is not pretty.
However, she has some traits that REALLY get on my nerves and I find it hard to shake off the annoyance and sometimes anger that I have…
She is an accomplished woman with a wonderful family, but seems to be very insecure. She feels the need to validate herself, her decisions, etc to a degree that leads to bragging and sometimes judging and criticising others to a point that I find very aggravating.
Fiance and I have spoken about it, and he also gets angry and it embarrasses him as well. He has told her several times not to brag and to stop criticising others, but it does not sink in.
This weekend it was my FI’s brother-in-law’s birthday and we were all at the house together for a party. Fiance and I gave his mom a ride home that night and she had been criticising her daughter’s Mother-In-Law at the party, in the car on the ride home, and the next morning (we had to go over there in the morning to pick something up).
SERIOUSLY, she needed to get over it. It got on my nerves so much that Im still thinking about it today and I’m wondering…why does this get to me so much? Why can’t I just let it roll off my back?
I grew up with a mom who never had something bad to say about anyone…very very rarely would she find a reason to criticise. I was also taught that we are all human, everyone makes mistakes, live and let live, forgive, and to also be very humble.
So on the one hand, the constant bragging and judging others drives me CRAZY, and on the other hand, I need to remember she is human with flaws and there is no reason for it to get on my nerves and for me to judge her so harshly…
How do you bees get past annoying traits in close family members? I really want my Future Mother-In-Law to be a big part of our lives…deep down she is kind with good intentions…so I need to find a way to not let these annoying quirks get to me. Any suggestions?