Post # 1
This is not the first wedding for either one of us and we are an older couple. This weekend we will be trying to cram the contents of his big house into my tiny one (I may have a tiny house but I have 25 acres of land). Between us we have at least two of everything, sometimes more (like 4 blenders!). I stated several times on our wedding web site that we do not want gifts and I was told to mention gifts on the invitations is tacky, so I didn’t. Did I do enough or is there something else I can do to spread the word?
Post # 3
Whenever people call, remind them no gifts! Suggest they donate money to somewhere, some sort of charity or something. Or they can give you money for your honeymoon
Post # 4
im the same.. please no gifts and im going to put it on the party invite (after we get back from eloping) to get the message thru.
ive read here its rude to do this but i think it will be a ruder shock for me to get alot of gifts that i dont need so im going to risk the bee’s equiquette wrath on this one
Post # 5
Ah, I think you were wise indeed to plan on eloping!
I have long passed what we call in ecology – the point of diminishing returns. That when the end results do not justify the energy expended to get there. It is often used when describing predator-prey relationships but it surely applies to my situation. Too late now – the invites have been sent out
And bobbypinpearls – we don’t even want money gifts!
Post # 6
I would set up something so they can donate to your favorite charity in your name. People will still give you gifts, that’s just how some people are. Do you have a wedding website set up? Because you can explain on your website that you do not want gifts and if people do want to give something, put a few links to your favorite charitys.
Post # 7
this is what we did: on our wedding website, we asked that if our guests were considering getting us a gift, that they consider making a donation to a non-profit that we are involved with and then explained why the charity is important to us. we are also making a dollar for dollar matching gift in honor of our wedding guests, which seems to have the impact of getting the point home that we really would like people to donate instead of give us stuff. That said, we also realize we’re going to get gifts so we registered for some stuff, but not a lot.
Post # 8
I think mentioning it on the website is enough. There are still people who are going to get you a gift, no matter how many times you tell them not to. Just thank them graciously and obviously don’t try to make them feel guilty for bringing it. 🙂 If you get another blender, just take it in stride– use the new one, and donate the rest to a charity shop…
Post # 9
Yep, set up a charity. If someone feels obligated to give, they’ll do it. Hopefully people realize taht being older and prevoiusly marrie,d you don’t need serving bowl sets and stuff like that. But, you’ll probably get something. I couldn’t bring myslef to come to a wedding empty handed (gift card? Cash? SOMETHInG!) even if the bride told me not to bring anything. I would feel waaay too guilty
Post # 10
One more thing– you might want to make sure you have a designated place to set gifts and cards, when people inevitably bring them. Somewhere out of the way enough so that people who didn’t bring gifts don’t feel guilty, but also somewhere specific so that you’re not just awkwardly carrying around things during the day.