(Closed) We can’t afford the ring he wants. :(

posted 10 years ago in Rings
Post # 17
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Def try overstock.com got FH’s band there for $320 at the jeweler for the same ring they wanted $1,700 took it in there to have in inspected without saying where we got it and they thought we bought it from them at a different location.

Post # 18
7172 posts
Busy Beekeeper

How does Fiance feel about a temporary ring?  There are some really nice ones out there – and then you can upgrade later (say, on your 1-year anniversary).

I was in a similar boat.  The ring Fiance fell in love with was triple our budget for it, and we just decided to go for it.  He wasn’t willing to wait and really wanted that ring on the day of.  I ended up shuffling around some expenses and ultimately will be putting a few wedding expenses on a credit card because of it.  Not ideal, by any means, but it worked for us.

Post # 19
48 posts

OVERSTOCK! I got FI’s ring there for 65. I found one at the jeweler nearly identical to it, the only thing different was that at the jeweler’s the middle wasn’t a brushed finish, for $300.

Post # 21
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

What if you used your engagement ring as your wedding band and he got his band? Kind of seems fair to me. And then if you can financially at your anniversary, you get your band.

Post # 22
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would make the choice either wait on larger purchases (house, car etc) until after you’ve paid off the ring, or get a cheaper ring for you and/or him.  You can always upgrade (guys too!) in a few years!  Just b/c you don’t have it now doesn’t mean you can’t ever have it!

Post # 23
223 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Look at alternative (cheaper) metals  like titanium–and consider doing a 25 pts instead of 50 pts on the rock?

I also like bamboo’s idea-let him get his band, and forego your own band (or get a less expensive wedding band).  That way you won’t have to feel guilty about the beautiful engagement ring you have-while your FH “settles” for his band.

The band my FH wants is about $2k, and since I got a beautiful engagement ring that set him back a few bucks, I decided that I would do whatever it took to get his band for him–even if it meant downgrading a couple of flower arrangements or shaving off a couple hundred dollars from my shoe budget–but that’s also because I feel like most of the wedding day is centered around what would make me happy–so I want something for him to be happy for too. 

Post # 24
319 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

We were facing a similar problem but our long engagement helped a lot in terms of having time to save up. However we had our heart set on an engagement ring and wedding bands that were still out of budget (because we weren’t going to dump all our savings into the wedding). My SO really liked a band that had diamonds since he is already wearing platinum ring on his other hand. We ended up shopping until we found a jeweler that could do the bands and engagement ring we wanted within our budget also instead of platinum I got white gold.

However, we also bought a set of cheap silver/tungstein bands that we were planning to use as our temp wedding bands in case we couldn’t get our favorite bands in time for the wedding. They were like around $5-$10 and looked really nice. We were really planning to wear that for another 1-2 years until we had enough budget for our favorite rings (we didn’t want to compromise or get an upgrade later) luckily my 3.5 year engagement worked out well in terms of financing.

Best of luck!

Post # 25
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

How about a white sapphire or cz in the band he wants temporarily. Then set a real diamond in on your anniversary. If you post pics of the band your Fiance wants maybe we can offer better suggestions. I would only buy a diamond in person, not online, because diamonds of similar cut and clarity can look quite different depending on the quality of the cut. We got FI’s band from QuiltedPony on etsy – he was great, not expensive, and is in Oregon if you want a personal consultation.

Post # 26
121 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I second (third?) the option to either use your engagement ring as a wedding ring, or get yourself an inexpensive band.  I wear only one ring, and I know many other women who do the same.

Alternately, do you have old jewelry you could have melted down to make him the ring he wants?  Broken necklaces, orphaned earrings are both good candidates…  Do you have any family jewelry that is unloved that you could either take stones from, or again, melt down the gold?

Post # 27
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I third (or fourth??) the idea of using your engagement ring as a wedding band and taking that money that would have been for your wedding band and putting it towards his band. 🙂

Post # 28
463 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

why dont you do a less expensive one just for the wedding and then upgrade for the 1st anniversary together!!!

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