Post # 1
And after a VERY difficult few hours, where she hated our apartment, hated the restaurant, and back at my house hated dessert and my coffee (she had tea) , ect, and for grand finale she REGIFTED me the Lenox china platter I gave her for Xmas.
I thought we were cool. wtF?
Post # 3
did you mention the fact that you gave her that platter? i wouldn’t have been able to resist saying something along the lines of:
“oh wow! this is just like the one i gave you for christmas! you must have enjoyed it so much you wanted me to have one too.”
ok maybe not the last part but i would have definitely let her know i knew.
Post # 4
I kissed her on the cheeek and thanked her. My MOm helped me pick out the platter, and was present when I unwrapped it. So she knew. I didint want to make a fuss in the moment after she behaved so badly at dinner. I thanked her and said I think I have a matching vase. (of course I do I bought it).
Post # 5
@Sparklydelitebride: If it was me that she was treating so horrible I would have called her out on the regift. Sorry you are having such a rough time with Future Mother-In-Law. I hope it gets better.
@janetsnakehole: :“oh wow! this is just like the one i gave you for christmas! you must have enjoyed it so much you wanted me to have one too.””
Post # 6
It is sort of funny. I’m an attorney, buty also hopelessly perfectionist about things around the house. And Mother-In-Law seems to resent that I work. We are Jewish and they are Italian. And I get it, back in the ’70’s iit as easy and a good woman stayed home, ec. But it is much harder today. I cook from scratch every night. We have all of the chores ona tight cycle, but once you get her out of her house she is on the warpath.
It was kind of dissapointing, since I LIVE to please,and get praise. It would have been so easy for her to givce a nice compliment. Seriously. But she came over, announced that we need to re-paint, and we must be “LAZY” since we haven’t and unloaded her baggage.
Weird for me. I’m a perfectionist. And also a PAtent Attorney in New York City, so it isn’t like I have low standards, or am not making life nice for her son. I work 50+ hours a week and consider our house to be immaculate. I am chalking it up to maybe social anxioty that she suffers from? IDK. I can’t get too sucked in. She can be dramatic, and that might be a black hole for my energy.
Post # 7
Wow!Good for you for being the bigger person!
Post # 8
It sounds like you handled the situation very well!
I can relate a bit. Sometimes my Mother-In-Law can drive me crazy with all of her opinions and suggestions. To keep peace I keep quiet and then vent to Darling Husband. For us it’s the cultural difference that prevents me from speaking up, so Darling Husband always has to put in my two cents. If I would to do so, it would be horribly disrecpectful. I found that one out the hard way.
Post # 9
Ugh I thought we were on the same page since I promised her a million grandchildren. And right away! But she was crazy swearing in Italina under her breath for the entire 3 hour dinner (Italian SUnday Dinner I arranged bc it is her thing). I hope she melts the ice aroudn her attitude soon. Esp bc My folks are throwing us a beautiful wedding that she refuses to give ” not one fucking dollar. IN Italy it is 100% TH EBRIDE’S SIDE SO DON’T ASK ME FOR ANYTHING NOT ONE DOLLAR” in her words. Ser, we don’t care about the money sp much as her attitude.
She says in Italian that bride’s family ( and the bride) pays for everything. Including rehearsal dinner, ect. I mean, we don’t mind THAT MUCH, but she ould at least be gracious. Her guest list alone is almost $20k. She could have at least said “thanks for having me” instead of “WHAT, ou are too lazy to repaint this place?”
I swear to god, she hated the mini pastried from the bakery so much, that on her way out she said “I would be embarassed to have paid money for the dessert you served.”
That was way harsh Tye.
FYI we painted 4 years ago when I moved in.
Post # 10
“I would be embarassed to have paid money for the dessert you served.”
“Really? I would be embarrassed to complain to my hostess about her hospitality.”
I know you couldn’t have said that, but WOW that lady has some nerve.
Post # 11
@Sparklydelitebride: What on earth does your fi say about this?
Post # 12
Whoa–FI needs to tell her to stop verbally abusing you. It isn’t okay for her to treat you that way! It sounds like you were a lovely host and way more gracious than most people (including me) would be!