(Closed) We made a BIG decision last night…

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2681 posts
Sugar bee

Good for you!  I think its great that you are both in agreement and have already talked about your plans and are not letting others influence you.  Im sure once you explain to your family and friends they will understand what you want.  Best of luck to you!

Post # 4
Member
937 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Good for you! Beautifully written post. And you sound like you have a great man by your side, too!  🙂

Post # 6
Member
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

I agree, you sound very at peace with your decision… That’s a wonderful thing!  Isn’t it amazing how freeing it can be to listen to that deep inner voice?

Post # 7
Member
829 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Definitely good for you! You have one life and do what you think will make you both happy. Dont concern yourself with others expectations and wants as hard as I know it may be. You sound like you have a great head on your shoulders! I think in the end you are making a great decision.

Post # 8
Member
2205 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

It good that you guys are on the same page about it.  you may never feel completely ‘ready’ to have kids, but spending time together, for however long you think you need will make you a stronger couple and stronger parents!

Post # 9
Member
1385 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Good for you, with all that family pressure it must be a hard thing to admit to yourself that you would prefer some baby-free years. But honestly I think it’s healthy to have some baby-free time, for anyone. :o) Good for you!

Post # 10
Member
1250 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

What matters most is that you and your life partner on the same page about children. Everyone else will hopefully get on board eventually, and once you ARE ready to have kids, I’m sure they’ll be excited to welcome them into the family. In the meantime, you and your soon-to-be husband can enjoy each other and know you’ll be great parents one day!

Post # 11
Member
7152 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Good for you. My Fiance and I feel the same about just enjoying being married for a few years. I think it helps to work on one new thing at a time.

Post # 12
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

This is one of the many reasons hubs and i are waiting to have kids.  I just love spending time with him, and right now I’m so busy with school and work that we don’t get as much time together as I would like.  While there is a higher risk of complications of waiting until I’m 30 to have kids, we both feel it is worth the risk. We are both in agreement that we will take what we can get at that time, and if we don’t have kids than it wasn’t meant to be for us

Post # 13
Member
2201 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Good for you! We’re waiting about a year after the wedding to even think about starting trying. I’d wait longer, but we’ve already been living together for over 2 years, so we’ve had plenty of “us” time to get us started.

Post # 14
Member
2208 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I would print that post out, and store it somewhere so you can look at it when people are getting down on you. Also, if you ever question your decision, you will see it came out of love for your future husband, and an absolute seriousness about the role of parenting.

Good for you, and congratulations on making such a thoughtful, self-examined decision. It is so tough to really get in touch with everything in our heads, and you have here.

Post # 15
Member
2463 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

good for you for being able to articulate what you really want and go for it! my parents were married fairly young (21 and 22), and waited 10 years to have kids. they were put under a lot of pressure by their families, but they still say how happy they were that they waited and how it was one of their best decisions–they were able to put their careers first, grow up together some more, and wait until they were really ready and excited to have kids

Post # 16
Member
372 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

This is such an important realization! I am ALL FOR really getting to know your husband (not that you don’t already KNOW him, y’know) and enjoying your time together. My grandparents were married fairly young and had kids right away. Then before they were all moved out, I was born and they adopted me. Once I moved out, my grandmother didn’t know what to do with herself, and it was even worse when my grandfather retired. They couldn’t stand living with each other.

Luckily, they didn’t divorce or anything, but he did go back to work. He’s 72. And he’s working a full-time job 3 hours away from home… he only comes home on the weekends. LOL. I keep saying to my Fiance, I do NOT want this to happen to us!

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