(Closed) Wearing my Mama’s dress.

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
722 posts
Busy bee

I think wearing the dress would be a tribute to your mother and a link between the two of you. I am sure it was difficult and somewhat shocking  for your father, but also meaningful. Your Dad has many months to adjust until your wedding-I am sure once the initial shock has passed it will be easier for him to see you. 

If you want to talk to him about it I would give it a little time.

Post # 4
Member
581 posts
Busy bee

I think you and your father should give this a little time.  Maybe in two months you could put the dress on again and see how you feel.  If you feel you may want to wear your mom’s dress, then talk to your father to get his thoughts.  If she has a veil, maybe that would work with a new dress.  Or, maybe getting a new veil to go with your mom’s dress.  A small change may make it easier for your father…..and you.  Best wishes.

Post # 5
Member
1046 posts
Bumble bee

That is very sweet… I’m sure it will just take him a little time. What a beautiful tribute to your mother!

Post # 6
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Give it a month and ask your dad how he feels. YES it will be hard on him, but in a good way because it is such a positive way to remember your mother. My mom’s best friend came to my wedding (she’s like my second mother) and her husband died 10 years ago. She weeped a little at the wedding b/c some of the songs reminded her of her husband, but she was still happy. If your dad wants you to wear the dress (and you do, too), you should do it. I think it’s wonderful. You could also wear it just for the ceremony and wear something else for the reception

Post # 7
Member
979 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Is it enough that you wore it once and your dad saw you in it?  Is that enough to satisfy your feelings?  Maybe get your portrait done in the dress and then wear another dress for your ceremony?  Like the others were saying if you give you and your dad enough time for the shock of all the memories to wear off it will be much easier for you and your dad.  Hang in there you will make the right decision.

Post # 9
Member
1765 posts
Buzzing bee

Maybe you could have some alterations done to make it a little more your dress, and a little less your mom’s dress?  I also like the idea of using a different type of veil–or maybe wearing your mama’s veil and a new dress?  There are many possibilities.  And giving you and your dad time to adjust maybe one of them.  Maybe your aunt will have ideas too.  Best Wishes.  🙂

Post # 10
Member
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

i think it probably brought back old memories from your father, it was probably shocking to him. he was expecting to see you in your mothers dress. but if you are anything like me i look exactly like my mother, there is the possibility that he came in and saw his wife. i hope you know what i mean. just tell him that it means a lot o wear it. he will understand. i think a second time he will see his daughter.

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