(Closed) Wearing rings on *THAT* finger when you’re not engaged/married?

posted 9 years ago in Rings
  • poll: "I think wearing rings on *THAT* finger when you're not engaged/married..."

    "...should be legally punishable"

    "...is disrespectful to the institute of marriage"

    "...will confuse society"

    "...is quite sneaky"

    "...is a redundant issue because it doesn't really matter, HELLO"

    "...reflects a brave and admirable rejection of societal pressures"

    "...is the choice of whoever owns the finger"

  • Post # 62
    77 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I used to wear my Claddagh ring, heart point down (before I sadly lost it) and a celtic band that my then boyfriend, now husband bought for me on my left hand. This was in late high school and early college right before we got engaged. It was more for me than anyone else. I knew we weren’t engaged and the rings weren’t technically promise rings or anything. I guess at the end of the day they were just symbols of my heritage (Celtic/Irish) and the fact that I was in a very committed relationship. Neither of us had money for an e-ring at the time (or a wedding for that matter) so I just did this instead. Nobody mistook them for anything and I didn’t really care. *shrug*

    Post # 63
    365 posts
    Helper bee

    I don’t think it matters, but I do think it’s confusing for other people.  When I did it I always got stupid comments.  I always thought it was pretty obvious that it wasn’t an engagment ring, but oh well.

    Post # 64
    2031 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Oh, I forgot about another time someone asked if I was engaged…when I was wearing a white and blue sapphire ring on the middle finger of my right hand, LOL.  I think people just assume whatever they want no matter what Wink

    Post # 65
    96 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    My fiance (before he was my fiance) bought me a ring for an anniversary present and that was the only finger it fit on, so that’s the fingre I wore it on. I just made sure to tell people that we were nto engaged, it’s just the only place I can wear it. I don’t think people should wear rings on “that finger” to pretend to be married (unless it’s for a reason, like to thwart perverts at bars or to get the creepy guy at your coffee shop to leave you alone) b/c that is a bit disrespectful to those who actually are married.

    Post # 66
    140 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I have worn anywhere between 0 – 14 rings AT ONCE. Including both my ringfingers and thumbs (but not pinkies) and even after I met my Boyfriend or Best Friend.

    As I grew older and my tastes changed I have gradually lowered the number. Now the average is 2 – usually left middle finger and right ring finger.

    But for a very long time we had BOTH worn plain gold bands (that kind that is used here as wedding bands) on our ring fingers – it was a 2 year anniversary gift we bought together – we had them custom made and wanted them finished with intricate engraving only to be told after they were made that they can’t be engraved… So we just said f-it, it is a gift and we can wear whatever we want so we did.

    We wore them for 8 long years and I was secretly planning on using them as our wedding bands… Then we broke up and I thought mine was lost. Long story short, we got back together and during recent cleaning of our flat my Boyfriend or Best Friend “found” the ring. I have not put it back on, I wear it on a chain with a pedant he bought me – if he had asked me to put it back on or wore his, I would gladly wear it but this way he can see my ring finger is waiting for something 😉

    When we were wearing our bands we got a lot of conused looks and questions, even from our close friends but after a while they got used to it and when they heard the story of the anniversary gift they were OK with it.

    Also, it felt really good to have something to flash at those rude advancers 😉

    I say do whatever you want, it is your finger!

    Post # 67
    3148 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2010

    it never even crossed my mind that it would bother other people to wear a ring on the ring finger when not engaged/married. 

    getting upset about another person’s ring choices is pretty stupid. sorry, but why get all bent out of shape about it? 

    even if somebody wanted to wear a diamond solitaire or a plain band and they’re not engaged/married– who cares? it’s their business. they have their reasons. 

    Post # 68
    13094 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I would never wear a ring on that finger besides an e-ring and a wedding band.  And if I see a ring on that finger of someone else, I’m going to assume they are engaged/married.

    Post # 69
    281 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    When I was dating a musician and spending way more time in bars watching him play, I used to wear a pearl ring on my left hand, because I found it kept the unwanted advances to a minimum.  And it fit better on that hand, so I left it there most of the time.  

    Post # 70
    394 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    My Nana used to always tell me it was bad luck to wear a ring on that finger if I wasn`t engaged/married, so I never did until I got engaged.

    Post # 71
    390 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I wore my promise ring on my left hand until i got engaged. Some people who didnt know me thought i was engaged but it wasnt noticable

    Post # 72
    1091 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I used to work in a tux rental shop in college, and groomsmen are DOGS.  I bought a cheap CZ ring from Macy’s after a particularly aggravating shift where a groomsman requested that I provide, ahem, entertainment for the bachelor party.  The cheapie ring worked to keep most of the creepers at bay. 

    Post # 73
    84 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I’m WAAAAY late on this one (but I’m new!) but was happy to see the thread. I’m not a huge jewelry person, so I only ever wear one ring at a time and always on the left hand. My right hand is an entire size smaller than the left, so none of my rings fit on it! I also am right-handed, so I hate when they get in the way/I knock it on something. 

    So, I’ve been wearing a ring that SO picked out for me when we first started dating. People ALWAYS assume it’s an engagement ring, even though it’s blue topaz. I don’t mind the question or having to explain the reason it’s on that finger instead of the right, but it gets a little embarrassing when they launch into, “ohh…need me to talk to your man for you? Haven’t you been together a long time?!” Mostly it’s like NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! People are nosy. 

    Post # 74
    48 posts
    • Wedding: June 2013

    In Germany you wear you’re wedding run on the right hand, so it’s never been *that* finger to me. I came to work after NYE and a colleague asked me whether I had any news and peered at my hand and at first I had no clue what she was on about!

    Post # 75
    5654 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    It will likely confuse people, but so what? It’s just jewelry, wear it where ever and however you want. If someone is “bothered” by where someone else is wearing jewelry, they need a life.

    I personally never wore a ring on my left hand until I became engaged. I wore a promise ring on my right hand.

    Post # 76
    1488 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I used to wear a fake diamond ring on my finger when I wanted to just go out, have a good time and not be bothered by any guys. It’s actually funny though, many times it would backfire and I got hit on more while wearing a ring. Hmmmmm….

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