(Closed) Wearing white to someone else's wedding! Or my wedding!

posted 4 years ago in Guests
  • poll: Would you wear white to someone else's wedding?
    Yes : (0 votes)
    No, no way!! : (131 votes)
    100 %
  • Post # 16
    2600 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    mrsohara:  A dress that resembles the bridal party? Well…that certainly takes balls to wear.

    (is ‘balls’ the right word? 😉 )

    Post # 17
    1125 posts
    Bumble bee

    Can I just ask where this dumb rule came from? Why in the world would someone see a woman in white and think “oh is that the bride?”…do they not know who the bride is? It’s a really silly “rule”.


    Personally I didn’t give a crap what anyone else wore to our wedding. I dont wear white to weddings simply because I know that some are super sensitive about it, and I don’t want people talking badly of me. But it is, frankly, not worth my time to think badly of someone wearing a COLOR. 

    Post # 18
    8439 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    No, but that’s because I don’t have any white dresses.  I don’t see the big deal with wearing any particular color to a wedding.

    Post # 19
    296 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    I feel it’s just tacky.  Sorry no ones that clueless, if you want to buy the dress find somewhere else to wear it 

    Post # 20
    1119 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2017

    It’s annoying but on my wedding day I feel like I wouldn’t really notice or care because no one is going to think she will outshine the bride. Everyone will probably look at her like she’s a big idiot and that’s makes her look bad. I don’t understand why women do this but this seems to happen a lot. 

    Post # 21
    205 posts
    Helper bee

    Aw some of you are so harsh! It’s so absurd that someone would wear white to purposely annoy the bride or blend in with the wedding party, so she likely had a reason for it. As someone with bad luck (and I have some serious bad luck w/ weddings … rental car not available despite reservation, debit card stolen so I couldn’t pay train fare, lost a shoe in transit!), here are some ideas of things that could have happened:

    Maybe she had to travel to your wedding and packed only a few dresses. Then her luggage got lost and she only had the white dress she flew in or packed in a carry on.

    Maybe she spilled all over her colorful dress that she planned to wear 15 minutes before your ceremony, so she had to change quickly and white dress was all she had clean. 

    Maybe she had recently gained or lost weight so the white dress was all that fit and she couldn’t afford a new one. (Or didn’t realize the others didn’t fit until the day of the wedding- this happened to a friend of mine who ended up just wearing her work clothes to a formal black tie wedding because her dress wouldn’t zip!)

    Maybe she just hasn’t been to a lot of weddings and has no idea of the rule. Who knows? But it’s possible she was embarrassed and hoping you would be too busy having fun to notice!

    Post # 22
    191 posts
    Blushing bee

    I wouldn’t. That said, the bride probably wouldn’t notice. I just checked back through my wedding photos and found two friends wearing white dresses, one wearing a cream dress and one in a white top and gold skirt. Plus my Mother-In-Law wore a white top + grey skirt. I didn’t notice any of them!

    Post # 23
    645 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    I don’t really have an issue with white as long as the dress isn’t screamingly bridal. If someone wears a floor length white lace dress then yeah ok but just a normal white summer dress I don’t see the issue. Someone wore a white dress with pink flowers on it that I know if it had been posted on the bee people would have gone no don’t wear it but she looked lovely in it and I couldn’t have cared less! It actually made me laugh as I nearly went for a wedding dress that was white with a pink floral pattern and we would have matched! 

    Post # 24
    9528 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2016

    caitlynrenee:  this.  It’s not even about whether or not it matters (because really.. who cares?  No one is going to mistake who is the bride) it’s just about not being totally clueless as to the one wedding rule every guest knows.

    Post # 25
    1780 posts
    Buzzing bee

    All the colors in the world and these women can’t avoid wearing white for one day?! So disrespectful! I won’t lie, there was a girl in a lacey white dress at my best friend’s wedding- my friend wouldn’t kick the girl out but it did bother her, so I bumped the girl at dinner hoping she’d spill food on herself. She didn’t but her hair got caught in the beading of my dress LOL priceless!

    Post # 26
    530 posts
    Busy bee

    yupmarried:  so you think it’s more appropriate to act like a 16 year old “mean girl”?

    Post # 27
    1149 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I wouldn’t care if someone wore white to my wedding.  I wouldn’t wear white to someone else’s wedding, because it’s a pretty well-known social taboo.  It’s like you don’t wear a qipao (no matter the color) to a Chinese wedding, since there’s a good chance the bride will change into one some time during the wedding.  I would take the stance to try avoid any clashing with the bride.

    Post # 28
    6727 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2015

    I will admit that I wore off white – more like a cream – to a wedding once.  I know people say there are tons of other dresses in the world, but in a pinch, this was the only one I could stand that also looked decent on me. I wore a blue shawl and sucked it up. I felt kinda stupid all night but the bride didn’t care and no one else mentioned it.  I looked nothing like her.  Anyway I’d say if desperate, I’d wear white again, but hopefully I’m in a better position to find something else.  

    Post # 29
    132 posts
    Blushing bee

    As a guest, I definitely wouldn’t wear white to a wedding.

    Its not a matter of ‘being mistaken for the bride’ but it’s the bride (and groom’s) special day and she’s probably just spend a lot of money on a (probably) white dress so its courteous to let only the bride have that special colour to wear.

    It’s kind of like.. a male guets wearing a crazy coloured tux to someone’s wedding… Just don’t. You’re not supposed to be the centre of attention. The bride and groom are. Anyone who draws attention to themself as a guest just looks silly.

    Post # 30
    264 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2016

    people typically wear white to stand out.  I know my FI’s grandmother is planning to wear white even though he asked her not to. She apparently owns no other suitable dress in any other color on earth.  It’s annoying, but I won’t lose sleep over it.

    Originally I asked the family to wear specific colors for professional pics, but only my side is complying. Plus feuding may mean that one of my Future Brother-In-Law will be missing, smh. I know it sounds spoiled, but can they just let me be great on that one day. Can I get one color cooridnated pic with both sides of the family????

    OK, I’m done whining, lol.

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