Post # 1
Question: I got engaged a few weeks ago. I never went ring shopping with my fiancée, but had picked out the ring with my mom and dropped in a “my mom knows what I want” so I could get what I wanted but it could still be a secret. The ring I picked out is very petite and has very small face diamonds (which is one of the things I love!). When I picked out the ring I decided I probably wouldn’t put a band with it, but never told my fiancée about this until after we were engaged… He seems kind of offended by this idea. If I did get a band I probably wouldn’t get one, or if I did I’d probably just wear it separately when I didn’t want to wear my erring (because of height, like when we have babies ect). He made a comment about me not wanting people to know I was married? I’d still be wearing a ring at all times…I don’t think people actively check to see if there is a wedding band w/ it…am I crazy? To me it’s simply about look and the fact that the face diamonds would be covered by any band you put with it…
Post # 3
I struggled with this because my halo has diamonds on the side and I wasn’t excited about the idea of a band covering them. I finally decided that I wanted a rose gold band and am so glad that I got it. I really don’t care that the diamonds are covered up, it looks beautiful together. They aren’t soldered together so I can still see the side diamonds when they move apart but it’s nice to have them together.
Find some kind of compromise with your FH though, you are a team now and should be able to work together. I totally understand why he wants you to have a band and I get why you don’t.
Post # 4
- Wedding: June 2010 - parent's backyard
@kl1987: I know a few married women who wear just an e-ring only.
I think he should not get a say in it. it’s your hand and you will be presumably wearing this ring every day for decades. you need to be comfortable with it.
however, you might want a plain band to wear sometimes. maybe consider getting one for the ceremony but try to talk him in to the idea that you won’t wear it every day?
if he puts his foot down, then choose a wedding band that you really love and tell him that you’re not going to wear the e-ring after the wedding (or wear it on your right hand).
Post # 5
He wouldn’t put his foot down. I know in the end he will let me do whatever I want. I think I might get a band that is similar to my ering. I can wear them together for special stuff and wear the ering when I go to work ect and the band when I don’t want to have the ering getting caught on stuff. I was just very surprised that he seemed so surprised by the idea! (my mom and sister both don’t have a wedding band).