(Closed) Wedding Breakfast vs No Wedding Breakfast?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
899 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

It seems quite common to invite some guests for the ceremony and evening reception only – this is what happened to us at the wedding we attended yesterday. In yesterday’s case, the “evening only” invitations were given mostly to local people, and the invitation included information about some of the couple’s favourite pubs for lunch, etc.

It can be done (and is quite normal in the UK), but I think it needs to be done carefully:

– it’s unfair to invite guests who are travelling a long distance and then expect them to waste several hours in a strange town and feed themselves

– it needs to be very clear on the invitation which sections the guests are invited to, what times, where, and what type of food/drink will be provided

– I would make sure there is some sort of food at the evening reception (buffet/bacon butties/similar)

Post # 6
Member
1690 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

if you are on such a tight budget,  then those guests not ‘worthy’ of being fed may as well not be invited.

i think its rude to expect them to come ,  with a gift for you,  and there is nothing for them to eat…..

if you cant afford to feed all the guests at the ceremony,  then maybe cut the ceremony guest list down ….?

have the rest of the guests arrive later, but you cant really have them turn up for the ceremony then have to leave….surely?

I myself am on a tight budget,  and for my ceremony and reception i am having 20 guests……because i want to serve them a sit-down meal.  i cant afford more than 20, i wouldnt invite anyone and not feed them, it would make them feel unwelcome. 

most weddings i have been to have a small reception for close friends and family,  then in the evening,  other friends arrive for a party,  but there is a buffet laid on for those guests….plus if any of the daytime guests are still there,  you have to include them too.

Post # 9
Member
1690 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@MrsStobe813:

Im actually very sorry ,  that really was a bad choice of words, what i meant was,  if you really cant afford to feed them…..and i know where you are coming from (i have 20 guests)  then i think it would be better not to invite them, rather than have them all arrive at your wedding,  and then when everyone else goes to eat,  they are to go elsewhere….i really think they would feel pushed out and unwelcome.

personally i would not have them there in the first place,  its an all or nothing situation really. 

personally……i think theres nothing wrong with pub grub……i went to a wedding where the food was at a local pub and we had to queue to be served alongside all the other pub visitors……but the food was great!   and that In My Humble Opinion would be far better than your original idea,  and i think its gonna possibly be cheaper anyway….i think the meals cost the B&G  under £4  each and it was sooooo tasty!  they had 25 people so that cost them £100  tops…..you cant grumble at that can you?  you probably couldnt even cook it at home for that price.  

the pub might reserve a few tables just for you so you can all sit together…..

Post # 11
Member
1690 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

i think for 40 people,  most places wouldnt like to do al la carte,  they would probably want you all to eat the same meal…with the exception of vegetarian dishes…..

and if thats the case then all well and good,  you could order 40 of whatever meal you like…

 

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