Wedding Budget Rant/Overview

posted 3 years ago in Money
Post # 17
Member
1700 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

I considered doing a park wedding too. Here are a few hidden expenses to consider. 

Renting seating for the ceremony

Noise rules for the park for music and a microphone for the ceremony

Might not allow alcohol consumption

Might require that you pay an off duty police officer or park staff for security

Proximity to parking and restrooms

I think you should totally do it, but there may be some hidden expenses.

I’m still doing my wedding under $5000 for 175 guests, but it’s a search getting good pricing.

Our honeymoon budget is $2500 for Orlando, but its cheap because we are using my parents time share(which includes a full kitchen), booked flights and rental convertible in advance, and am only doing one day at a theme park. We are still going to a Brazilian steakhouse, getting a massage, and going kayaking and hiking. I think there are ways to fit things in your budget, just give yourself time to find a deal.

Honestly, if fi makes a fuss about costs, I’d let him find an alternative. Guys are traditionally in charge of planning the honeymoon anyway.

 

Post # 18
Member
1195 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
gaminggoddess :  since he thought it was too expensive, he should be giving you an idea of what he thought was reasonable. He can’t just veto stuff without making any counter suggestions. I’d tell him if you don’t have an idea or preference then I can safely assume my idea is the best available.

Post # 19
Member
345 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

View original reply
gaminggoddess :  I’m going to go against the grain here and say, yes, it’s okay to ask your parents if they are wanting to contribute and for him to ask his if you each feel comfortable. 

There are so many personal and family dynamics in these things and no one can know for someone else’s family. I wouldn’t rest on just people telling you “No they’ll come to you.” Maybe that works for their family and maybe not for yours.  Like everything else in your wedding, you should do what feels comfortable for you and your partner and family.  

If they have suggested they might want to help in the best, and if it feels comfortable/appropriate to YOU to ask YOUR parents, “We’d love if you were wanting to and able to contribute but it’s not necssary or expected”  (Or whatever feels right to you), you should go ahead and ask. Everyone has different relationships with their parents and money and while I’m all for hivemind on ettiquite for general wedding things, family relationships this way everyone is often different.  Do what feels right to you. 🙂 

Post # 20
Member
977 posts
Busy bee

It’s great that your parents offered to help, but you should be prepared if his parents decline to offer financial help. Not everyone can or will. My mother didn’t…even though she could and I didn’t ask. She prefers to die with a few hundred thousands rather than spend it now. 

Post # 21
Member
1737 posts
Bumble bee

You can’t tell someone what to pay to come to your wedding. If you want parent contributions, then you can proceed with a sit down conversation with each set of parents separately, so that there’s no pressure. 

Hey Mom and Dad, this is the plan for the wedding for these dates etc. We’re adults and we’re happy to fund the costs of our own wedding however if you would like to contribute as a gift to us please let us know if there is something you would like to pay for, or if you want to contribute your help in other ways, like crafting or dress shopping or helping with invitations, otherwise we’ll be thrilled to celebrate our marriage with you and can’t wait for the day.

Change it up based on the type of wedding you’re having. You’re adults it’s your responsibility to pay your wedding costs. They’re adults who get to choose whether they want to financially support their adult children.

 

Post # 23
Member
288 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2018

My recent wedding cost under $3000 for everything, including dresses, jewelry, dinner, everything.  We only had 21 guests though.

If they’ve expressed that they want to help, then mention it to them that you’ve figured up the budget and ask what they’d like to help with.

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